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Any advice for a soon to be homeless lady?


CallMeViolet

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Circumstances, or choices?

 

I'm sorry you're facing that, I don't really know what to say as it's never been something I've been anywhere near dealing with myself...do you have a job? If the alternative to homelessness is to stay w some "lunatics", maybe that's not such a bad option, so long as they aren't dangerous? I would think its got to be easier to achieve financial stability if you've got access to a shower and laundry facilities at least...

 

I don't know if any of that is helpful...hope so.

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I'm sorry to hear this.

 

Would you like to provide a little more detail into your current situation as well as some background as to how you've gotten here? I think that would allow people to provide you with better advice and share their perspectives. Or maybe you already have a post introducing yourself or giving a bit of an autobiography that you can point us to?

 

Hopefully you can share some more information.

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Samuel, thanks for sharing that link.

 

And Violet, I am so so sorry to hear the horrors that you have been through. It makes me so sad, and angry that your parents failed you so terribly. No child deserves such brutal treatment.

 

If you could still provide a little more information on the living situation you will be leaving and why, I think that will help people to get more specific. No doubt in my mind that someone will be able to help.

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 I am sorry to hear that you are in this situation. Where are you staying tonight? Do you have a car and job? Do you have a gym membership?Do you live in Arizona/ Alaska? If I were homeless with a car and job I would just rotate parking at big box stores and sleeping in my car while bathing at the gym until I saved up enough money for a deposit somewhere. Gym also has perks of something to do that makes you feel good and they normally have water fountains and Television. I would get a 24/7 gym, Planet Fitness if you have one near you only $10 dollars a month.

 

If some for some strange reason I didn't have a job or car I would probably get on facebook and post or ask around if I could stay with someone and in return I would clean and cook until I could get a job to save up for my own place.  I would be very selective with who I picked if I could.

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I am sorry to hear that you are in this situation. Where are you staying tonight? Do you have a car and job? Do you have a gym membership?Do you live in Arizona/ Alaska? If I were homeless with a car and job I would just rotate parking at big box stores and sleeping in my car while bathing at the gym until I saved up enough money for a deposit somewhere. Gym also has perks of something to do that makes you feel good and they normally have water fountains and Television. I would get a 24/7 gym, Planet Fitness if you have one near you only $10 dollars a month. If some for some strange reason I didn't have a job or car I would probably get on facebook and post or ask around if I could stay with someone and in return I would clean and cook until I could get a job to save up for my own place.  I would be very selective with who I picked if I could.

I agree with this post. The only thing I would add, and I know this is an 'out there' idea, but you could always live in a storage facility. I've actually put a lot of thought into the idea before because I almost lost everything a few years ago myself.
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Circumstances, or choices?I'm sorry you're facing that, I don't really know what to say as it's never been something I've been anywhere near dealing with myself...do you have a job? If the alternative to homelessness is to stay w some "lunatics", maybe that's not such a bad option, so long as they aren't dangerous? I would think its got to be easier to achieve financial stability if you've got access to a shower and laundry facilities at least...I don't know if any of that is helpful...hope so.

Circumstances.... Obviously if I felt it were safer to live with family I would... Consider though the kind of relationships I've formed only knowing what I was raised with. I have like 3 relationships left.. Those are themselves tricky and complex... It would seem you really don't know someones true character until you really need their help... A lot of people seem to think that because you need help it automatically makes you like some kind of slave to them... No I have no car... With my health problems I ended up dropping out so I don't really offer any experience... Ive also lived in the country most my life. since I can't get a ride to work I never had the possibility to make car moneuy. I live in Michigan. I'm pursuing art because I'm just good at it and there's no reason not to try it with how much attention I'm getting for it. That gym idea is interesting... hmm..
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Find homeles shelter. Mishigan is Cold region. winter + you health problem will be very dangerous for you. http://www.homelessshelterdirectory.org/michigan.html Shelters  http://www.homelessshelterdirectory.org/foodbanks/MIfoodbanks.html Food help. 

 

If you don't have stuff/people keeping you in Michigan consider relocating south. Warmer climate will be less dangerous. 

 

There should be many place where you can look for help. 

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I'm sorry for the circumstances.  Search in your area for homeless shelters (at least for food/shower/bed/security).  Seek out art shows and craft shows, etc in order to generate some income with your art to give you some capacity of self-sustainability.  The gym idea was a clever idea!

 

 

I am not sure what you mean by 'just because you need their help, it make you their slave'.  If it's in terms of a religious charity and expecting conversion...yeah.... I would avoid that but if someone offers you food/shelter and maybe wants some volunteer help or a way to gain working experience in exchange then that is not a slave situation.  negotiate a fair trade where you both are better off and it's a consensual agreement.  example:  free room/board/meals if you volunteer 15 hours a week or something like that.  

 

Keep us posted so we know you are ok!

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It would seem now that my circumstances have landed me in the very undesirable position of homelessness... I don't have any family to stay with as all of them are complete lunatics...I would just like some advice.

 

In my country there is red-cross assisted living for homeless.,..also free showers etc...its pretty good.

Lot of citizen initiatives for some reason. Concentrate on finding a job that can pay some rent (room share maybe).

 

Maybe you can find a friend you can crash or something or live in a car and go to the gym early for showers. (oh wait i see the last option was already discussed).

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I mean the last people I stayed with had an issue with me like walking around in the yard and would give me shit about things that had nothing to do with me. or when I stayed at my uncles house his gf would freak out and scream about shit at me; fully aware of my history.

I say slave because the people I've stayed with seem to think I should also just completely give up who I am to appease them...

Seriously I've been yelled at simply for speaking a lot... like I said no one wants to listen to me... Though keep in mind the kinds of people I was associating with..

slave in the sense I was aggressed on for being me.

My friends brother actually stayed at one near some friends of mine. yeah luckily I have some people willing to let my meds be delivered to them.

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If you are going to go homeless Violet, make sure you are around a lot of support. For instance there are three centres in the UK (not useful for you I know) that support single person homelessness well and offer a myriad of opportunities to help those that want to be helped.

 

Maybe there is something similar in the US. Do some research and find out. I know because I have worked directly with homeless people for the past 6 years or more and I know the very best opportunities here in Britain. I have to think there is something similar where you live.

 

All that said, I am sorry to hear about your situation and hope you manage to find some true support and a way to get back on your feet. All the very best.

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  • 4 weeks later...

So its been a little less then a month and I have stayed at a shelter; working on getting my shit together. I'm doing way better since getting away from all the negativity... but still looking for a job. Need to get my GED...

 

I am glad that you're doing better after having left, and I applaud your bravery for leaving in the first place. 

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