stephenscorzo Posted August 13, 2014 Posted August 13, 2014 I posted Steph's video about Robin Williams and my cousin posted a "::jerking off::" motion in my comments. I feel so angry that being Anarcho-Capitalist means friends and family refuse to debate and would rather attack my character than discuss or defend the opposite positions. The implications mean I lose more and more of my old circle but then I realize I never had friends to begin with and I feel sadness and anger that I had ever had loyalty to people when they end up just having a lack of compassion like my mother is with me. I have anxiety because during the holidays I will see my cousin and I don't want to see my family now.
steadyb Posted August 13, 2014 Posted August 13, 2014 Are you sure that your cousin is trying to insult you? Could it mean something else?
Brentb Posted August 13, 2014 Posted August 13, 2014 I have anxiety because during the holidays I will see my cousin and I don't want to see my family now. Why do you have to see your family? Can you tell them this: I feel sadness and anger that I had ever had loyalty to people when they end up just having a lack of compassion
stephenscorzo Posted August 14, 2014 Author Posted August 14, 2014 My cousin has the same kind of sarcasm to opposition that my mother has. It starts off like they're your friend and listening to your point of you and then when you start making points that make them feel insecure they attack by ridicule rather than argument. At least my older brother attempts to use arguments when we have disagreements. I don't make a lot of money, I have a child and need resource help at times, this makes me feel sick and my wife's family is not that different maybe a little worse since there is no real resources. Part of getting resources means going to family functions for holidays. I am disgusted with my cousin and I don't want to go any more or have anything to do with my mom's side of the family if they're going to berate me for giving a damn about freedom. I don't know if there is any way easier to do this. It seems like I already have my finger pulling on the grenade pin of defriending more than just my cousin. I don't know what to do, at least not right now at this point in time.
K.o.t.H. Posted August 14, 2014 Posted August 14, 2014 Have you listened to many of Stefan's podcasts that talk about this subject? They are very helpful. I have listened to many of the older podcasts this week and several of them would be very helpful for you in this situation. I have always had major difficulty debating with family but I am getting really good recently. If you have not done so yet go through the podcast lists and look for titles that seem like they might help. The more time you put in to being a better debater the better it will get for you to have these types of discussions with family and friends.
regevdl Posted August 14, 2014 Posted August 14, 2014 I don't think this is a problem specific to anarcho-capitalists. This is a human problem. Society has become so 'dumbed down' and distracted around every corner than no one really gets to the bottom of things in life, personal life, societal life etc and they have childish reactions as a way to avoid or deflect, or try to shame you thinking others will follow like lemmings. It rarely works and only makes them look as idiotic as they are behaving. Have you kindly confronted him? I think it's always best to at least make someone aware of their behavior to at least give them an opportunity to consider, apologize, change, etc...even if you think there is no chance, it's a courtesy and higher ethics to at least bring it to their awareness, how it made you feel, maybe even give insight on why you think they are behaving like that and they can either consider your feelings, remain silent if they have nothing of use to offer the conversation or you will remove yourself from annoying hostilies. Also, once you bring awareness to them (not publicly, but in private) maybe offer them or empathize with them that you also (just assuming) were at a point where these topics were not in your consciousness and felt taboo or whatever and only when you learned how to discuss, debate, your confidence grew, etc, etc. sometimes showing them that you were there once in your life will soften their edges and invite them into taking issues more seriously and more respectfully. Best of luck!
DaVinci Posted August 15, 2014 Posted August 15, 2014 I posted Steph's video about Robin Williams and my cousin posted a "::jerking off::" motion in my comments. I feel so angry that being Anarcho-Capitalist means friends and family refuse to debate and would rather attack my character than discuss or defend the opposite positions. The implications mean I lose more and more of my old circle but then I realize I never had friends to begin with and I feel sadness and anger that I had ever had loyalty to people when they end up just having a lack of compassion like my mother is with me.I have anxiety because during the holidays I will see my cousin and I don't want to see my family now.I understand how you feel, but it is better to have no friends than fake friends. I know my old circle of friends thought I was a jerk, and I used to think that maybe they were right about me because I recognized that I did act a little aggressive around them, but then when I removed myself from the equation and found that they all still acted in the same horrible ways towards each other I realized it wasn't me after all. My aggressiveness was just me lashing out to defend myself against being treated like crap. So perhaps if you feel anxiety about your family then you should consider that there really is no relationship there, and while being alone during the holidays would suck it would probably be preferable to dealing with people who don't really care about you.
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