jgib Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 Hello all.... I think it is difficult to introduce oneself when there are so many experiences that are pivotal to define who we are. I am not long widowed. We were together for over 20 years. Three years prior to this accident, I also lost 4 family members. I have been through a lot of change and have had to face some truths I am not sure I would have faced had the circumstances been different. Freedomain radio and Stefan have opened my eyes and mind to things I think I have been very naive about. I am thankful for that. I have grown so much. I feel like I can recognize myself again. I have enjoyed reading all the contributions that people have made and look forward to contributing myself. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jpahmad Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 Welcome. What are some of those things or "truths" that you now have to face? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jgib Posted July 1, 2015 Author Share Posted July 1, 2015 I played into the farce of 'happy family'. My father was always portrayed as the bad guy and trouble maker. I have since come to understand that my mother was running the show. She was very emotionally detached and controlling. I don't remember being hugged by her as a child. Glad I got some from my dad, but I don't think she encouraged it much. She and one of my sisters ended up being the power couple of the family. I am glad at a young age I seemed to make the decision that I did not want to be like either of them and worked hard to used them as models of how not to be.... I was an empathetic, sensitive young person that struggled to try to keep the peace in a family that was not all that peaceful. Both my parents are gone now. Those are some of there realizations I have come to. I actually find it very difficult to talk about still. There was such a pretence surrounding our family telling the truth of it is difficult. Which is an interesting thing because truth plays such an important part in my adult life and the life I lived since I left home. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MysterionMuffles Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 welcome jgib. Sorry to hear about your loss, but also very glad that you have expanded your mind, and hopefully your heart, having gotten into philosophy. If you don't mind me asking, what was the accident? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jgib Posted July 1, 2015 Author Share Posted July 1, 2015 He was a very experienced cattle ranch manager that got tangled in a piece of farm equipment. He was young and it was tragic. Also completely life changing for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jpahmad Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 He was a very experienced cattle ranch manager that got tangled in a piece of farm equipment. He was young and it was tragic. Also completely life changing for me. Oh dear, I'm sorry you had to go through that. How was your relationship with your late husband? Any kids? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MysterionMuffles Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mister Mister Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 That's really awful. I don't want to politicize your loss, but just want to point out that the most dangerous work is done by men like fishermen, loggers, and farmers. Everyone always thanks cops and soldiers for their "service", but not these guys, who bust their asses and risk their lives to feed and house us. So sorry that your husband suffered death doing his job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jgib Posted July 1, 2015 Author Share Posted July 1, 2015 No kids, we made that choice together. It was a decent relationship. He was an honest, dedicated, honourable man that people liked easily. I have also come to realize a few things about our marriage as well. I think he would have been very open to this and we could have grown from it. I appreciate your kind words in regards to my loss. It is not an easy thing but I have chosen to try and find some positives from it. Part of that is finding out who I am for the sake of me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PatrickC Posted July 1, 2015 Share Posted July 1, 2015 Oh my that sounds like a dreadful accident. I'm really sorry to hear about that. I'm glad the content has helped you and welcome to the community. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jgib Posted July 1, 2015 Author Share Posted July 1, 2015 Thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Sambrook Posted July 2, 2015 Share Posted July 2, 2015 Hello, I am truly sorry to hear of your loss. During times of suffering in my life, I have sometimes learned things that made the situation more bearable, or brought a certain perspective. That helps, somewhat. I do hope you enjoy being a member of the FDR community and come to feel at home here. Best, John Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jgib Posted July 2, 2015 Author Share Posted July 2, 2015 I agree John and thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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