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Posted

Wow that's a truly fascinating and moving story.  So sorry for the horror of your history, and great admiration for the courage to break from it and build something better.  

 

  I imagine people ask you about your family, especially around this time of year.  Do you tell them the truth?  If so, what is the general reaction?

Welcome to the boards, look forward to chatting more.

Posted

I feel insecure and anxious about making this post, but I will post it anyway since I think it is important.

 

I don't think mellomama wanted a long intellectual analysis. I also don't think mellomama wanted to be told the way you intended to be interpreted.

The fact of the matter is that mellomama had a negative experience while reading your post.

 

Even if her negative experiences have everything to do with herself and nothing with what you actually wrote, I still think it would be more empathetic, helpful and productive of you to respond with something like "I am sorry to hear that you had this negative experience." and with genuine curiosity towards what created this sitation on an emotional level.

 

Does that make sense?

Posted

Does it make sense? Well that answer is simply no, but I do understand what you are saying - so allow me to expand on the holes in your reasoning.

 

In her own words she states, "I wonder how you thought that would be interpreted". Therefore, your opinion that you don't think she wanted to be told the way I intended to be interpreted is invalid.

 

 

 

 

"I wonder how you thought that would be interpreted" and "the way I intended to be interpreted" are (possibly) two different things. 

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