sagiquarius

Hmmm, I see what you did there. I wonder by what percentage this would reduce BW usage on the FDR side? Perhaps Mike can chime in at some point. At the very least, slapping active podcast directories on bitlove is yet another marketing avenue for FDR to get the word out. Well done captain. On another note: Tell me, is being a captain of a canoe as glorious as commanding a starship? I graduated from ferryboat captain to starship a while ago. I must say, it's a lot more demanding.

EDIT: Thanks to everybody that has expressed interest for another conversation. I intend to host another conversation in very late August after I close on a townhouse that has a good internet connection. My current connection is awful and I wouldn't be much of a good host trying to do this on a crappy internet connection. I'll up date this post when I have a date in mind. I was speaking to another FDR listener today, and we've both noticed that many folks within the FDR community have a strong entrepreneurial spirit within them. I know some that currently run their own business, are beginning a freelance start-up, or are thinking about starting their own business or going freelance. I'd like to gather that power and drive to create into a monthly google hang-out. A place where ideas can be exchanged, feedback given, bad habits challenged, experiences shared, associations made, or even to promote your business. Perhaps we can devote some time to 2-min Elevator pitches and ask for feedback if we feel so inclined. I'd like to address two questions for the fist meeting: 1.) Why did you become an entrepreneur? 2.) What fears did you have about starting your own business? Tentatively scheduled next Monday July 21st at 7pm US mountain time ( -7 UTC). I'll host and create a g+ circle that will include anybody that is interested. If you own your own business or are thinking about it, speak up!

well now, isn't this neat: One of my colleges knows somebody that recently introduced him to FDR. Which tells me that they are likely smarter than the average bears; plus they've expressed interest in meeting up to chat about stuff and things beyond the ho hum ghosty stuff. I hope I can find a few more like minded folks and get a little group going out here in western montana.

Hello all! I know this is a long shot, but if you're in western montana, I'd like to meet up! It's been nearly a month since I moved here from PA; and while I'm not yet settled, I am wondering if I can pull some hidden liberty lovers out of the shadows into some social events. Come on now, don't leave me out with the crickets! ;-)

Hey there Popey-Pope! Request denied. You can start really apologizing by releasing the names of the child abusers. Then You can apologize by disbanding the church and helping to free minds of this particular strain of the theist virus. Oh, and don't forget about all that wealth the church has "accumulated" over the years. Yup, gonna need to distribute that in ways that will help you apologize. While you're at it, don't forget to look yourself in the mirror and marvel at the wretched human being you have become, because there is no coming back from protecting this sort of evil.

I dunno how effective that would be. As a long time listener to podcasts and all sorts of media, I generally ignore advertising, even in the form you mention, because it's almost always not something that interests me or relevant. If Stef needs to seek financial support from sponsors (because donations aren't enough or whatever), what message do you think the listeners are sending to Stef about the importance of the work he is doing? If donations are "enough", but Stef still seeks financial support from sponsors, what message do you think that might send to the listeners? Personally, I don't want to hear 30-60 second ad spots on the podcasts or call-in shows. If I were Stef, I wouldn't feel comfortable doing that. I think I'd struggle with a feeling of it almost cheapening the importance of the conversation vs the benefit of the money from the sponsors.

Come on dude, how do you think this is perceived by others? The OP was asking a question, and noting the difficulties of having a friend for whom you may have romantic feelings. I'm in the camp of women and men can be friends just fine (just like gay dudes can have guy friends) so long as they are willing to deal with whatever sexual tension may, or may not, come up. I've heard some married guys say they refuse to have any female friends because of the potential for sexual tension causing some stress in the marriage. What would you say to them? How does that tell you about the marriage? Then you've the polyamorists ... Let's not go down that road.

Welp, I'm convinced. I say that after considering my own experiences as well. May it be on my side or theirs, there almost always does seem to be one person in the friendship that thinks about a romantic partnership. Of course, it's possible to continue to be friends if your romantic/life partner goals don't mesh, but it can be hard. Still, I"m a strong advocate for getting romantic attractions out in the open for discussion. Keeping that shit bottled up is awful. Kevin, what do you mean when you say "loaded and complicated?"

Why don't you trust yourself?

That's helpful, thank you. When you say "nerdy", are you referring to those like are into things like sci-fi/fantasy, board games, reads more than the average ... that type of nerdy?

Yeah, I heard this my brother. Being friends with somebody for whom you have a strong, unrequited attraction, is a terrible experience. I hate the feelings that type of interaction brings up: The longing, the wondering why, the "what if" statements, the efforts of "doing stuff" to be more appealing. My tactic to handle that situation is to be honest with my feelings. I had one friend that I struggled with this a lot. I flat out told her "dude, I don't think I can do this, being around you is really hard for me." Eventually, I was able to get past it, but we aren't close friends ... and I like it that way. Do you even bother to get that far, Kevin, or do you just cut it off without saying something? I mean, if there is some mutual respect you might at least give her a reason why you may want to back off, right? I wonder why it's not such a big issue for women relative to men? It doesn't seem to be a big deal for gay guys either - at least the ones I've dealt with. Sorry, Why did you feel this needed to be said? Of course we're speaking in generalizations (we need to, right?). I'm not trying to be a dick or anything; I really don't understand why somebody has to point this out when these types of conversations come up. Generalization is an easy way to discuss a recognized prevailing pattern within a system or social context. Why does generalization have a negative reputation? Interesting, thanks for sharing. So, do you find it difficult to be friends with females because of the potential for attraction (like what Kevin and I were saying above), or is it more that you find most females to be tedious and vapid? I've heard this complaint before, and have noticed that it's pretty difficult to find girls that like to talk about the things you mentioned. Guys seem to have a broader interest in stuff like psychology, philosophy, the workings of things. Dunno why. In my observation, this stuff is more likely to be of interest to bi or gay girls relative to het girls. Come to think of it, I don't have anybody in my memory that I can list as an exception to this trend. There's got to be, I know it, but I'm betting most straight girls have different priorities for their romantic partners. I dunno, I'm betting you've hung around way more girls of either orientation than I have. What do you think? Do you notice any sort of patterns that tend to go along with sexual orientation?

Damn. I think I recall that. Was that in one of the podcasts in the main feeds, or in the donor feeds? "I'm sorry that you are coming to me, instead of me coming to you ...." that is something my father would need to say to me before I even consider having a relationship with him. He'll never do it, but hearing it like that is powerful.

So, can we all agree that a friend is defined as a meaningful relationship devoid of romantic and sexual attraction from either party? So, does that mean a bisexual person is gonna have a hard time finding friends? Do you avoid close friendships with the gender to which you're sexually attracted, or do you keep a handle on yourself and "be friends" anyway? Ya know, with the knowledge that there is some attraction there. I guess it depends on the personal dynamics. What about folks who have tried dating, found it didn't work, but still remained close friends (I love ya like a sibling, but I don't wanna fuck ya)? The mystery is gone, and they don't feel they are a good romantic couple. If you aren't a good romantic couple, what does that say about the friendship? Steve is pretty clear about it, and I believe he speaks for most of the population:

Holy. Fuck buckets. I ... yeah, I am, to say the very least, sofaking sorry for the terribad shit storm of a childhood you had to endure at the hands of evil pieces of shit that see fit to torture helpless and dependent children. I also felt a tremendous degree of solidarity with you when you were describing how things could have been if you weren't so hobbled by your ruinous childhood. I got choked up when reading your recounting of how your boyfriend responded to your story. Sounds like that man is a fucking keeper, and I'm sooo glad you have the strength to work through this. I could identify with a lot of what you were saying. I even felt a pang of pain that your boyfriend was so kind and emotionally available to cry as he did. I'm right there with ya sister, I really am. You and your boyfriend are lucky to have found each other. How have things been since then? I know I raised this post of the dead, but I wouldn't feel right reading something like this and not responding to you. Reading this thread was an emotional roller coaster, and I thank you very much for having the strength to face this and share it as you are.

Well, for me, the behavior we're discussing was born from insecurity. I can't attribute my insecurity to anything in particular, but I think Quad made a good point about a lack of father contributing to insecurity (and increased sexual activity, in my experience). Acknowledging the effect my parents had on me (and understanding it was OK to express anger about that) went a long way to helping me discover what values I do bring to the table. Did you have zero father figure when you were growing up? Do you/did you find yourself going out of your way to please folks? Even folks that weren't worth the effort to you? It's one thing to go out of your way to please a long term romantic partner or somebody to whom you have a loyal and fulfilling bond, it's another to "do stuff" for folks that barely give you much in return save for excuses of why they don't want to hang out much. Sound familiar? I'm glad you're taking part in the FDR conversation, it'll certainly help you discover what you bring to the table. Took me 2 years of listening nearly every day, and applying what I could, before it kicked in for me. What a ride, man. I wish I'd have found FDR when I was 24! PS. Do you have a temper? I mean, one that is easily triggered and kind of scary? That was another issue that was tied to the insecurity.

tnkltnkl and Ivan, Not off topic at all, and thanks for the input. Yeah, I was insecure most of my life. I've put a lot of energy (over the last 5-years) into breaking the habits born from that insecurity. It was so bad that I would find myself "automatically" adjusting to how I thought people would perceive me - not even giving them the chance to respond to my true self. I had this assumption that I, in general, wasn't good enough and needed to compensate for that in some way. This took the form of emotional manipulation, verbal aggressiveness, or being overly accommodating by "doing stuff" to show my value instead of living my values. I was so busy planning, adjusting, and compensating that I wasn't existing. Then came FDR, and it all went to shit! Does any of that ring some familiar bells for you guys?

Nice, thanks! Aaaand of course the bible is up there. Sigh.

ok, now I'm gonna have to watch this damn Frozen movie I keep hearing about. Nice lyrics Kevin.

"Daniel Reisel searches for the psychological and physical roots of human morality. Full bio He studies the brains of criminal psychopaths (and mice). And he asks a big question: Instead of warehousing these criminals, shouldn't we be using what we know about the brain to help them rehabilitate? Put another way: If the brain can grow new neural pathways after an injury … could we help the brain re-grow morality?" http://www.ted.com/talks/daniel_reisel_the_neuroscience_of_restorative_justice About 15 mins My first thought was that this would make a fascinating FDR interview. There is some discussion in the video comments as well. This snippet encompasses much of it, IMO: Emma McCreary I think you are doing some important work, and I don't doubt that you've had several success stories. A lot of times people just need to be exposed to a better way of living. At the same time, though, I must disagree with you that "It's not too late for anyone." That's wishful thinking, plain and simple. There are some people that it is just too late for, and this is not a matter of opinion at this point with our current technology and medical capabilities. Look at someone with a traumatic injury who has had damage to their amygdala. They may have once been pillars of their community but then they become extremely aggressive and unpredictable. You can't restore them to their former selves, barring a medical miracle on the horizon, any more than you can make someone with down syndrome an MIT graduate. It's just not going to happen, and no amount of social programming is going to change people with an underdeveloped or damaged amygdala--such as psychopaths/sociopaths. There have been cases, like with Jill Bolte Taylor (also a TED speaker), who've been able to repair the damage done to their brains after a stroke, but I know of not one case in the scientific literature of a rehabilitated psychopath. Ergo, for now, such a thing should be appropriately placed in the "very highly improbable to impossible" category.

James, where have we heard these types of claims that can't be proven? Oh, I know! You can't know if god exists or not, there is no technology to measure the bastard, and no way of knowing he doesn't exist ... therefore god exists. "There is no technology to measure or test my claim of plate tectonics, therefore this theory is a valid alternative to the one you believe and I'm not at liberty to prove my claim because ... well, we just don't have the technology. Has nothing to do with me." When I first saw this video some years ago, I did a bit more reading because I wanted to see if it could be possible - 'cause, ya know, it sounds kind of sexy and and all, at the time. I recall hearing one dude say that he thought the energy from the sun was impacting the em shield around the planet, which causes the core to build up energy over time and release it in the form of matter from the inside out. Creative idea, but how the fuck could anybody possibly even begin to test that idea? I had forgotten about it until I saw this thread. These vapid, "pseudo science" pot hole theories could easily dent the shiny rims of your intelligence as you drive over them as you cruise the internet. Handle with care and all due rationality and discernment.

What are the other reasons you avoid amazon? I currently live in PA, and have almost completely stopped using Amazon because of the sales tax. I remember the state pushing Amazon to charge and report sales tax because they had recently established a warehouse hub in my area. Amazon could have not complied, but there was already precedence for Amazon's compliance in other states, and I'm sure dropping the warehouse to make a point was not high on the short list of options.

He's totally one of them, don't let that coy attitude fool you. Good luck Duncan, and good show on the Ironman! Which episode or podcast prompted you to create this thread?

Alex, so you see this as a lost opportunity to convince somebody that there might be a better way? What was it about his post that gave you the slightest hint that the OP was interested in debate? I mean, you could perceive the post as a method of "reaching out" for help. Were that the intention, mayhaps he could have worded things a bit more clearly, yes? In any event, it seemed trollish to me.

Spanking is corporeal punishment, right? In general, a "spank" is the act of hitting a child with the goal of utilizing the child's natural aversion to pain to illicit compliance or obedience. Hitting children teaches them nothing but how to avoid incurring the wrath of the parent. The negative effects child abuse has on the brain is pretty clear. Both in scientific study and empirical observation. Creating a topic attempting to argue for the benefits of spanking or "visiting evil upon children", on this board of all boards ... come on. You knew how it was going to be received, and yet you did it anyway. Why? Because troll. If you arne't spanking your kids (hence, not following your own advice), then what evils are you visiting upon your kids to inoculate them from the woes of the world? Tell me your methodology so I can compare to the science I've seen on spanking. Give me some personal details so I have an example of how you're applying this to your life. Because, it sounds like your saying it may be a good idea for some parents to hit some kids, but not for you to hit yours. Should parents visit evil upon their kids? No, of course not. Parents should be kind, gentle, understanding, and patient with their kids. Parents should be a guide to help their little life noob to adulthood. Parents should give the child the benefit of their worldly experience by sharing as much knowledge as is appropriate for their age. Parents should interact with their kids as if they are trying to earn the love and respect of their children. The benefits of visiting evil upon children is not one of those naval gazing activities that philosophers would be pondering about if they wanted to be of some benefit to the world... come on man, be serious.

Fuck. Guys, I'm awfully sorry, to say the least. Just getting a glimpse at what you're dealing with made me gringe. I'm glad you guys are here, and I wish you the best for happy and fulfilling lives.