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I recently lost someone dear to me. He threw himself from a bridge. We dated for 7 years from the time I was 17-24. He wrote a song for me and his mother has chosen to keep it from me because I refuse to go along with her narrative of what happened leading up to his suicide. Essentially, I'm not giving her the attention she wants so she is withholding something from me to encourage me into self erasure. I know that if he was alive he would send me a copy of the song. Technically, he owned the rights to the song, so his mother inherited it as he left no will. But the song was for me, he intended for me to have it. You may wonder, well then, why didn't he send it directly to me? The answer is that he wanted her to send it to me. She did post it to Facebook in order to share it with me and her audience. She has now blocked me. I can't help but feel I've got some right to the song as it was made for me, the message in the song is directed at me. I suppose if you serve as inspiration for art you've got no right to the artists work. Something about this situation doesn't feel right to me, I think it's that she is withholding it to spite me and has disregarded the fact that he wouldn't agree with that descision because he isn't here to defend himself. As far as my mind can reason, because of her blood relation to him, she now owns the song he wrote for and dedicated to me. Do you think I have no right to the song? seems that way to me.

I have always been fascinated by stories and storytelling. I have devoured more movies, games, comics, tv shows than I care to count however I didn't really have any empirical proof of the value of such things aside from entertainment. Though I have my own theories/beliefs on the values of stories I always remained skeptical of the veracity of my theories/beliefs and shrugged of repeating patterns as coincidence. Stefan was the first person that expressed a similar view on these works of art. I remember a podcast when he was arguing against the criticism of him reading bible stories to his child, the gist of his response being something like "these stories withstood the test of time so of course they hold value". This is very similar to what Jordan Peterson says in his lectures whether on the bible stories or Pinocchio. Now knowing what I know I'm a firm believer in the value and importance of such stories. Watching his "Stranger Things" review I'm really curious of his take on several other pieces of storytelling that I hold dear. I'm writing this to show my support of such content and I hope there are a lot of people out there who feel the same because I want more. MORE.

I have made an illustration featuring Stefan as a Marvel-esque superhero because why not. Enjoy

In light of the "spirit cooking" events, we've been exposed to an artist by the name of Marina Abramović. I knew of her work before these ties to Podesta, but honestly, as of late, her art has caused me to pause and question whether she is an artist or just exposed to money which is poured into an idea surrounded by institutions masquerading as art. How do we know what art really is? Is it a feeling or can it only be expressed through traditional means? Is modern art really art? If it can't hang on a wall or sit in a room is it art? Why are there so many different takes on art. There is not doubt that modern art has a "cool factor" that simply doesn't exists in the renaissance period pieces. I guess I wonder if artists are trying too hard to make something art when it really isn't. But this leads me back to... What is Art?

The audio was clipped from "An Honest Conversation With A Single Mom" & "The Truth About Single Moms" Subscribe to my channel for more Illustrated Philosophy.

Not all artists are lefty send in your work and let’s discuss. Since Art is the expression of aesthetics and aesthetics is near and dear to philosophy it’s necessary to share. (Please show respect and empathy to the posters it’s not easy showing work.) Thanks

An attempt to capture the philosophy of one of the greatest thinkers of all time using pen, paper, and a video cam.

Many of you have probably seen my videos in which I illustrate provocative and compelling philosophical thinkers. If you haven’t please check out my YouTube channel Illustrated Philosophy. Here’s the latest one narrated by Stef and Dr. Linda Gottfredson on race and intelligence.

Hello All, I wrote, recorded and published an album of musical numbers for your listening pleasure. The lyrical and artistic themes on this work are heavily influenced by this community. So, I hope you will enjoy music written for you by someone like you. http://angtta.com/?page_id=387 http://www.cdbaby.com/Artist/Angtta https://play.google.com/store/music/artist/Angtta?id=Aw6ywhhnqpk53dkduyywzp6kc3y http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=ntt_srch_drd_B00NA8VPQM?ie=UTF8&field-keywords=Angtta&index=digital-music&search-type=ss https://itunes.apple.com/us/artist/angtta/id915253037?ign-mpt=uo%3D4 https://soundcloud.com/angtta https://www.facebook.com/pages/Angtta/625708277543010

Pretty much every forum I've ever visited has had this thread so I'm surprised I didn't see it here. We do have a liberty-themed one but I thought this one would be fun for people who just want to share whatever happens to be tickling their earbuds in the moment. I'll start (youtube links are encouraged, you can embed them by just pasting the youtube link into the chatbox)

Hello, We often hear Stefan comparing examples to other examples in order to clarify and spot contradictions. For example: If somebody said "Government is moral" Stefan would probably reply similarly to this - "So if I come to you and take your money at gunpoint, that is not moral. This is exactly what governments do, therefore we cannot call governments moral if we have already established that they steal, which we know is immoral" Then the contradiction becomes clear since we all know that this is precisely what governments do. My question is, does this art of spotting and pointing out contradictions with the use of metaphors and different examples have a name? Is it Aristotle's First Principles? Sorry for a silly question but I wish to learn more about this art of....brilliancy.

Life and parenting were winning themes in this year's Hampton Beach sandsculpting contest. For more photos click here. Third Place: Carl Jara, "Role Play" First Place: Karen Fralich, "Life" There was even a guy getting sucker punched by the IRS. Yep, it hurts. Fourth Place: Abe Waterman, "Sucker Punch"

My Flag Pharmakon My flag pharmakon.* My flag made of the cheapest of China's materials. My flag made in honor of angered spirits twisting and turning in crucifix fields. Wrapped knotted strangling my constitution's pride. My flag making a ruin of my native wilderness polluting it for play money. My flag tucks in and tightens, bribes and corrupts my culture and jails and vilifies those that champion their rights, my fight. Torture terrorists torture terrorists torture terrorism torture. My flag fights with my journalists and artists and demands their dishonesty and threatens authentic integrity with punishment. My flag's authority trumps vitality and the skies sleepily darken. My flag bundles our fighting men side by side and ties them to terrorism in foreign lands. My flag spreads wide to cover up military rape to uphold it's glory seekers warped self image of good deeds. My flag drapes blue courage over the shoulders of well armed cowards vying for sanctuary. My flag's position on the flagpole is determined by a dictator instead of a conscientious community. Our flags at home could not be more false and transparent. The more ashamed I become of my country the higher the waving flag. The more glamorous in high definition the recruitment's glory, the more shit they talk on George Washington. The more they dishonor the founders the higher they wave that flag. They raise it up while we lose our grip. They take away what it stands for till we can't stand tall and reach it. They put it beyond our grasp and sadistically celebrate our need of it. I will not pledge my allegiance. I accuse malfeasance to the flag of the divided states of freedom, segregated states of thinking, this hierarchy of enslavement called citizen-subject-slave-ship, under a new world order. Terrorism is the policy we're 'subject to', 'a party to.' That these two parties do. Their policy boys inflicting their violence monopoly on Sovereign men discriminated against by uninitiated yet indoctrinated nationals intoxicated with authority taught to hate liberated behavior. Sovereign men against gang initiations fending off unaffordable freedoms. We are not your enemy. I'm aware this flag represents the sacrifice of my ancestors. They didn't sacrifice for this. It's a terrorist threat flown over conquered and unconquered lands around the world. It's a white flag of lazy surrender behind bars propping up hollywood's wrecking ball stars. Blood, guts, and glory, the only price for freedom is the blood we spill holding our perverted joysticks. It's a brand of opportunity. Costs for captivity. Leave if you dare xenophobic nationalism. The more terrified I become to fly my flag upside down, the more justified I become in retiring it. Never has there been a more welcomed friendly fire than for this flag to mercifully retire. I loved this flag. This is a funeral pyre. * Pharmakon is . . .a poison and a cure, a solution that damns us, associated with cultural ritual sacrifice. Wikipedia “A pharmakós (Greek: φαρμακός) in Ancient Greek religion was the ritualistic sacrifice or exile by the sorcerers of a human scapegoat or victim. The victims themselves were referred to as pharmakoi and the sorcerer was referred to as a pharmakon.[1] A slave, a cripple or a criminal was chosen by the pharmakon or sorcerer and expelled from the community at times of disaster (famine, invasion or plague) or at times of calendrical crisis, after being given pharmakeus or drugs by the pharmakon or sorcerer who was a practitioner of pharmakeia or pharmaceutics. It was believed that this would bring about purification. On the first day of the Thargelia, a festival of Apollo at Athens, two men, the Pharmakoi, were led out as if to be sacrificed as an expiation. Some scholia state that pharmakoi were actually sacrificed (thrown from a cliff or burned), but many modern scholars reject this, arguing that the earliest source for the pharmakos (the iambic satirist Hipponax) shows the pharmakos being beaten and stoned, but not executed. A more plausible explanation would be that sometimes they were executed and sometimes not, depending on the attitude of the victim. For instance, a deliberate unrepentant murderer would most likely be put to death.”

Werepugs! You can find some pages here. Pugs shape-shift into homicidal little-people during the full moon. Not philosophical? No. But the pugs represent two children with a neglectful, drunk mom. The shape-shifting represents the new found power of puberty. While the homicide is rage at their seemingly helpless situation. I've attached page one.

Hi everyone! This is my first thread on FDR. Firstly, I hope this is the right place to address the topic of art in a free society. Art is, after all, educational. Many enter a gallery or museum without considering how everything got there. See, I find it difficult to enjoy art if it's acquired through force (or, with tax-payer funds, if you like). Logically, anything within the gallery's walls, or state-funded in its creation anywhere, becomes affiliated with the state: its implication changes and it becomes a political tool. This isn't obvious until the whole state concept is unpacked. It should be remembered that art directors are bought, like teachers. And a fantastic way to silence an artist is to own their work. For example, I find it hideously ironic that a Leon Golub should exist in a government's pocket. Now, some artists today play with these themes, but here I'm addressing the general practice. It seems to me that people criticizing the private galleries and "vanity spaces" forget or simply ignore the hypocrisy in their claims. A state collection, really, is hardly cleaner than a private one. Many artists would kill to have their work purchased by a state gallery. The consensus is that you're not historical or "permanent" otherwise. But think on it: would you want your work, with all of its concepts, to be attached to the oldest platform of evil, however glamorous? I've read literally no essays or crits on these issues (save for this). Any links or books definitely would be welcome! If I've made any mistakes on this subject, please excuse my naivete and do correct me.

I'm currently working on a tragic novel and need some help on how best to demonstrate the virtue of the lead. To give a brief synopsis the novel is a tragedy set in modern day Paris about a sculptor, Anton Duarte, a black man from Tunisia who turns to stone. The fantastical device of turning to stone is used to demonstrate his fall from virtue and fame into lies, deceit, and madness. The idea for the motif of lies turning you into stone comes from Pinnochio's nose; but as a whole my two main inspirations are the play Othello and the novel The Picture of Dorian Grey. Tragedy to be effective as a genre must have the right structure. To use Stefan's phrase, "art is an emotional argument for virtue". Tragedy in particular shows what happens when a good person is corrupted and the work acts as a kind of warning sign "don't do this", and is empathetic to people who make mistakes and get drawn into evil deeds by showing the whole context. Othello for example, at the beginning of the play is virtuous and strong (according to Shakespeare's statist values), and it is Iago's manipulation of him into thinking his wife is having an affair that turns him mad. I'm struggling with how to demonstrate Duarte's goodness according to anarchist values in the first half. I like the idea of him being a bootstrapper, building his career as a sculptor of marble from humble origins as a plasterer at the age of 18 on on Parisian building sites. But here's the thing. I've also been playing around with the idea of making him a Muslim (does not drink, is an ascetic bachelor, prays five times a day etc.). From the viewpoint of the structure of tragedy, this would seem to say that Islam is somehow virtuous and represents truth (in counterpoint to his lies turning him into stone), yet I just can't imagine Duarte being an atheist. Anyone have any thoughts or ideas about how to demonstrate his goodness according to anarchist values before the tragic downfall? Any fans of Ayn Rand welcome! **Don't know whether this topic is in the right category but there doesn't seem to be a folder for art on the boards yet.

I haven't noticed a Topic where we might informally share our more artistic ventures, so I thought I'd start one. The world is influenced through the arts and creativity is a marvelous motivator. Does anyone have any music, art, writing on all topic life, love, philosophy? Dare to Share! I will lead by example. If it touches you, hurrah, if not, know I'll keep doing it anyway Our Dogwood Trail Beneath a canopy of jade I walk the path Guided by instinct I quack with the ducks I watch the fawns They watch me watching The eagles come with their demands of flesh I wave them away and bang my drums Like a woodpecker I tap out my territory I howl through the night and crow through the day I never dream that time will pass away Beneath a canopy of emerald I walk the path Guided by intention I am the salmon against the current Destiny depends on me The bear on shore hasn’t got a chance I swerve to the side The fool in the Fiat will be the one today Not the threat of a viper’s pit would stop me Mastery morphs into flow The muse comes and goes and comes again But the story never ends Beneath a canopy of amber I walk the path Guided by knowledge I still burn the hours in quest with the ferocity of a lioness I gracefully hold the jackals at bay Having learned to surf the current like a butterfly I feel the air shift as the breeze sweeps from the North The pine needles crushed beneath my feet A jay bolts down and startles me He screeches and when I look back cross-eyed and yell “I do not understand!” he only screeches again and flies away Beneath a canopy of blue I walk the path Guided by faith I confront the turkeys with hardly a squawk My mere presence sends them scattering I laugh as they squabble together Circling then in their warrior’s dance I laugh again If only they could see the sky like I If only they could follow the forms of light that skip between the clouds Like glitter spinning through space and time Particles of fairies or ghosts or cosmic dust Do they also watch me watching? Beneath a canopy of white I walk the path Guided by wisdom The turkeys have established their pecking order The ducks shake under the fountain The fawns graze absentmindedly right in front of me But the dogs then bark and scare them away I don’t mind though We will live to see one more day Before the light fades and the sky turns gray The stars come out and call me near The chirping of invisible life sonorously surrounds The scent of eucalyptus drifts before the final sound A glow pierces through the shadows and falls across my breast And in a ray of infinite knowing I lie down and beg the light enchant me I pray the stars play for me the greatest mystery of all things They merrily oblige They sing a festive song as I pass along No more mysteries for you now strident one The ducks the fawns the turkeys are all gone The wind whispers your last words in silence To the gods our Dogwood trail moves on.

Hello fellow members of the board! I didn't know where to place the topic, so here it is. I've just started working on FoO series in a visual form, anyone who is interested in using the art for their own projects - feel free to go to dA and download the image. I'll be posting more as soon as I get it done. Here's a link: http://saarl.deviantart.com/art/FoO-Series-I-447423487?q=gallery%3ASaarl&qo=0 Cheers!

Another art of mine somewhat related to FDR (at least for me) though I have some difficulties with describing it with words. If you'd like to use it in your projects feel free to do so. Bigger version available here: http://saarl.deviantart.com/art/A-way-home-448912852 To get a full size art please contact me here or via pm at dA. Cheers!

Greetings fellow Anarchist! It is my great pleasure to share my work with this community. Please check out the link below and let me know what you think! http://youtu.be/hsM6F12aLJw

No idea whether this is the right place to put this. i am working on a theory, and i was hoping for some input. Why is it that artists claim to hate financial elites and love the common man and yet produce art the common man hates but banking elites buy? to briefly explain where i am coming from, most original artworks are brought by banks directly as investment opportunities or by incredibly rich people as decorations for houses. The art community is incredibly closed off to people who break away from this model, as they are commercial artists. at art shows, the most audacious price for a work will make the most attention, and the rest will disappear into obscurity at provincial galleries. Why is it that on the first lesson of art school, i am told all of this, and then given a load of socialist books to read? how will these books help me sell art to banks? surly i should read up on economics and produce big sculptures that celebrate the glories of banking? Every one thinks art is great, and that public galleries are great because for poor people, seeing art is like a free cultural education. So they think art should be available to the poor, yet when a person dosnt understand the work, they are dismissed as not having the sufficient education as to understand the work. the criticism is not taken into account. if you are actually making work for someone, and that person tells you that they dont like the work, then you have to take their criticisms to heart. if you do not take that persons criticisms to heart and yet you still make money, then it is clear to me that you are not in fact making work for who you claim to be making work for. why are they all trying to claim to work for the poor? because the bloody professors are handing out these socialist books and marking them on how good a socialist they are, despite this not making any sense at all. so before the government gets involved, i want to straighten things out again. The artists want to produce work for rich people because they have the most money. The rich people want to buy art from the artists because of status, or investment or aesthetic desire. the obvious way to do this kind of thing would be to talk directly to the rich people and ask them what kind of art they want. Imagine the art school field trip to hsbc's underground art vault to discuss trends in art buying, or the art school field trip to the rich divorcee banker's 2nd house in Spain to discuss how he wants paintings to match his drapes. Or the artists could find a way to make art that 'normal' people wanted to buy or look at. i dunno both of those options seem hard so lets bring in the government to tell us what to like and what not to like. they hire university professors who hand out whatever doctrine is desired at that time, but usually revolves around the idea that business is bad and we need a bigger government. and nihilism. the government also takes money from people and spends it on art that it wants the people to see, and then makes this seem more moral then just selling art to banks. admittedly this option is boring to me, but at least im not holding a gun to anyone's head. intellectuals who are paid by the government grade and give prominence to work that 'they' like, so the value of work rises independently from its quality. People see this without seeing the causality, and think the art world is mad. they become alienated from art and stop engaging with it. artists see this and become more dependent on the government. the banks buy the work like stock because they know the quality of the work doesnt matter to the value. Artists see this, and not understanding the causality think that banks randomly choose work to exhibit, and so have no understanding of what is good quality art and what is bad quality art. thats what i am working with right now. i admit this is a total brain fart, but can anyone tell me if they think i am close to the mark? i am currently researching an essay on this idea so that i can stop it rolling around in my head like a bag of marbles, so would appreciate any ideas.

So i got an email from my secondary school art teacher yesterday. She is doing a retrospective of her past students who have gone on to study art at higher education. Apparently i'm on some email lists i was previously unaware of, and my name came up. It is true that after leaving her class i have gone on to study art at a good university, and i am starting to make breakthroughs into forming some sort of career. i would not attribute my success as an artist to her tuition however. As an art teacher, i found that she suffered from all the negative clichés that could possibly apply to an art teacher. She was a person who had clearly had no artistic success and instead lived her failed dreams through her job in a public school dominating small children. As a small child, i found her formidable and i never felt particularly endeared to work hard in class. On her part, she considered me a dreamer and a waste of her time. Luckily enough, her complete lack of any encouragement did not pervert me from my cause and i went on to achieve what i thought was a successful body of work for her to mark me on. She gave me a B grade, which i sincerely believe was the bare minimum she could have given me. As a side note: another of her particular perversions is a singular style of painting which she inflicts on her students like a savage burn, whilst doggedly punishing students who worked outside of her style. i am still in contact with some of her past student's and they still have the scars of this style show up in their work. in an opertunistic sence, there is a good opertunety to stand out in a sea of the same style. 6 years after breaking contact and pursuing my own goals, i receive this email from the blue. She is offering me a small amount of money, which is nice, and on top of this, appearing in a public gallery can only help my career prospects. plus there is always the hidden benefit of a feeling of vindication. i honestly believe i can produce a really good piece of work for this show, which will be a opportunity to prove to myself that the rejection she directed towards me was unfounded. i am in no doubt that this retrospective is a self-serving endeavour to further her career, and any work of merit will be attributed to her. on some level i think that i should play no part in such flagrant false advertising. Also after listening to freedomain radio, i have tried to make my art be an honest exploration of my true self, which has resulted in some new work. the thought of giving this emotional exploration of my deepest feelings to this corrupt woman gives me the hebbe geebies. i am also worried about the work being subconsciously repressed, or even actively censored by her (i have seen her pick up art work and make huge changes without asking) with the result being a morally corrupt work. ultimately, however, i feel this kind of opportunity might only come one time and i don't want to miss it. I would like to think that my art will stand up against corruption and so i don't want to snub it because of my own internal fears. I would like opinions on whether you think this endeavour is futile, whether my eagerness to do this work indicates something troubling in my subconcious and any advice you might have towards entering this kind of arrangement with a dangerous person.

In this video this famous ex-comic book writer ( Alan Moore, creator of the V character in V for Vendetta which is originally a comic book story that later became the symbol for the anonymous movement after the success of the movie) talks about many interesting subjects and ideas, among them, he talks about his own idea of what magic, art and fiction are, and proposes a different meaning to the word magic ( jump to 27:35 if you want to go straight to that, although I personally suggest to watch it all, I think it’s really worth it) Also I think in this video is presented an idea that perhaps can help to settle at last the old issue between science and spirituality, what it is and what role it may play in our lives in a way that I think can be very healthy and constructive http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Xkw41UdPGY What is interesting in the concepts and ideas he presents there is that I see finally a possible way that we can reconcile the basis of religious thinking and science, in a way that they don’t get mistakenly and unnecesseraly mixed together, or that one tries to eliminate the other,they both just have different perspectives and focuses on life that are valid (look in 36:05 in the video) I think we all can agree that we don’t need to think fictional stories and metaphors that are very moving and help us think about reality and have an emotional resonance for us needs to be scientifically accurate or real for us to think they are valuable. Like any good poem that we can think of uses metaphors to express ideas without the need to be objectively real and yet touches us on a emotional level Could we say there are two definitions or two ways we can talk about something being “true”? One being the objective reality proven by empirical scientific testing and another being what is true regarding our feelings about things? They both seem to have fought against each other a lot in the history of the development of our thinking, I think they should both be valued properly without being too much of one in detriment of the other, wich generates imbalances and can generate abuse and violence between people, caused by an impossibility of understanding between them. The main problem with the concept of religion is the necessity of infliction of the dogma in others, not necessarily in the reading of reality that those beduines that created the many tales that eventually got compiled in the bible( using a common example,) did thousands of years ago(another problem of course is the morality of those societies that we clearly recognize today how primitive they were, and if we’re able to separate things we can sort out where we can see real value in those stories without the need to subscribe to that primitive morality). In the case of monotheism the necessity of trying to monopolize one view or limiting it to one single god not only limits the way you can see things through symbols and concepts (see between 45:25- 50:43 ) but also generates conflicts and I think that is the reason why, as long as religion existed, there is this attempt to try to prove those fictional stories to be objectively real, to the point we get that even today with all knowledge that we have and advancement in science there is still this attempt to try to prove those stories to be scientifically true, even though there really is no necessity of that for people to see value in them, and also I think to be scientifically precise was never ever the point in creating any of those symbols, they really were actually a form of emotional comforting for people, a way of coping with reality in the best way they could, it deals with one specific way of processing reality that has nothing to do with science but it is also important, being our emotional understanding of our own internal reality, wich you could argue is solved by self knowledge alone, but both of them are important for the processing of our world I'd argue. And I think perhaps this has been forgotten these days by a lot of people, specially by statists atheists who thinks we only need science to deal with reality and nothing else, I also think this subject has not being addressed in any of the FDR shows I’ve seen yet. I think in great part religion is actually the main guilty part for the increasing rejection by society about the importance of this form of reading reality, because they basically monopolized it and limited people to only serve these old dogmas and their priests, institutions and authority completely apart from any kind of truth with the goal of serving opportunists trying to control people for their own advantage. Another reason why people today is negligeable to the value of that form of looking at life is because art today is mainly used to numb us and accept our current reality as slaves to the state and just keep going with it (see in 29: 15 and 31:45) he also talks about self knowledge( see in 36:25 ) like I said before, there's a lot of interesting ideas in the video Hope you all like it and comment, enjoy!

Hi, everyone, so I finally decided to participate in this great community and the greatest and most important philosophy discussion in the world, I hope that I find people here for a good exchange of ideas and value in all its forms possible, but first of course I'll let you all know who I am and my story up 'till here,first I'll give a general overview of who I am and what I do, and in the next parts I'll get into more details about myself and my personal history if anyone is interested General Bio: My name really is Rock (my father was a big fan of boxing fighter Rocky Marciano), I'm from Brazil (so sorry for any english mistakes) and I'm an ilustrator graduated in the State Arts College of here/ UFRGS ( wich means I've wasted 5 years of tax payer money for not much, because State college here is "free") I'm 28 years old I've worked in a brazilian animation movie production, (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pe-05WZSLl4 ) I've also made ilustrations for sketch cards for Marvel Comics, http://rocksilesbarcellos.deviantart.com/gallery/29249859 Lately I have been doing freelance work like illustrations for ads or other purposes, Im also a musician, and play in a rocknroll band, we do shows sometimes http://www.sintomaticos.com/ More recently I've started working in a company that helps public sector workers with laws and other things, they also give on line and regular classes to help with these things, I basically take care of any visual stuff they need,like ads, videos etc. I have been watching the freedomainradio show since about 2010 I think, my first one was the sunset of the State,but then I didn't got into the channel yet, I've subscribed after watching Stefan's debate with the zeitgeist guy he did in 2008, then I really got into it. And I must say it really made a tremendous diference in my life since then, only there I was first presented to free markets ideas, libertarianism, and of course the idea of a stateless society, but more importantly, after years watching the show I've finally got into self knowledge. I've started looking at myself, my life and my relations with my parents and therefore with others in general, and I've realized many, many things about it all, and that gave me what I hope to be a good guidance reference to make my decisions in life from now on my main source of income right now actually comes from my mother, unfortunately, I'm still living with her, and she's a retired accountant public sector worker with high paying retirement salary So basically, I’m in a moraly terrible situation, even though in theory I’m all for a stateless society and free markets and understand the fundamental immorality of the state, I am currently and have been most of my life almost completely dependent on it. But I'm looking forward to change that, the first step I took was to come out of my inercia that I had been and got any job that I was able to get after years not working, unfortunately it is still something related to the state as I mentioned before, coming here is another step I'm taking, I hope I can meet people and start something perhaps I hope promising and lucrative, I think now with bitcoin there's a bunch oportunities coming out thanks and I'm really glad to be here ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My current situation and issues I’m 28 years old and I’m still living in my mom’s house, like I've mentioned before, it’s a long story on why that is (I’ll give details in the next segment) but after watching FDR, I started looking more seriously about my situation and why I am where I am,and the role my parents had on it. I’ll try to sum up here, my mom is now a retired high office public sector worker, she worked with accounting of the governments budget and spending, and now have a high paying retirement salary, and that’s basically why I have quite a comfortable life living with her, financially I mean... Very early in my life I got into kindergarten from when I was about 4 years old till when I was 6, my mom worked all day and my father too, I never felt I had a really deep relationship with either one of them, my mom always and to this day basically treat me not really like an individual but almost as if I was her own organ like a part of her own body, and I always felt not listen to in my preferences and about who I really was, she was always very affectionate and I liked that about her, but she always had this necessity of pushing her preferences on me and I hated that a lot, she always seemed to have the need to diminish my own personal taste and preferences(still do to this day), and also my own solutions to any problem that I would be trying to solve as a kid, and basically most of the times she would just solve it for me, she always was and is absurdly super protective, and that’s probably one of the main reasons I am now so dependenton her. A lot of times I would come up with a valid solution for some problem, either a purely logical one or maybe something like helping in the house kind of thing, but she basically didn’t paid attention or recognize, even when a lot of times I was right and she was wrong, she still wouldn’t recognize it, or even if she did, she would still wouldn’t give me credit, it was absolutely frustrating, so for me these kinds of things it was a real struggle, and no matter what happend I always felt like I lost either way, and the times I’d try to get angry and insist on my point she’d just ridicule me and even laugh. I think my mother is that way basically because her mother was harsh on her, but she blocaded that, and got very close to her father, who died of a heart attack in front of her when she was about 9 years old, she said she was very close to him and learned a lot by observing him deal with people, so when he died I think she sort of took his role for herself in some way, and that’s why she has a very strong will, and a very strong personality, and that’s why I think between my mom and my father, she was more dominant in the relation than my father, she was “the man of the house” morally, she had higher income than my father. My father was a chief of police department, and suffered from depression from early age, his mother was a very lousy mother, she would say in front of the kids that she hated having kids. My father was emotionally absent, he was very sensitive, but with a very closed type of personality, also he was quite aggressive, and screamed when I did something wrong, he screamed with my mom too a lot of times when they argued, he would do it sometimes to strangers too, like waiters or people like that. I resented him for these things I didn’t thought it was in any way necessary at all, so between both, I was closer to my mother. I didn’t played much with my father, we did a little bit when I was very little, but after that we got more distant, he taught me a bit of english though, and he knew a lot about history, and had a good baggage on general knowledge, I liked that about him, but still, our relationship was really poor as father and son. So I think, because of the dominant role my mom developed as a person and also in the relationship with my father, she simply was not able to be an adequate mother, she diminished me, and made me extremely dependent on her, and so I’ve always had and still have problems asserting myself and my own will in general. And the more I Iook at it today the more I get the sense that the real reason my mother married my father and had a son, was really for her pride, my father was a good looking man, but very closed emotionally, and neurotic, and very weak emotionally. With that poor background on emotional and social development at home, I had tremendous problems dealing with people in general from an early age, my mom negotiated with me to a certain extent even though she was somewhat negligeable on that too, she spanked me a few times with no regularity and stoped very early on, so I was quite a peaceful kid, actually I was too peaceful, (probably for being used to my mom solving things for me too much perhaps), wich annoyed other kids and they would hit and bite me and steal things from me and I didn’t defend myself, and I remember to this day one time I was crying and called for a caretaker there to help and the woman basically told me to go away. It took me almost a whole year for me to finally do something, I’ve finally reacted at one kid agressing me. From this early experience I promised myself I would never be like those kids, I would never lash out, or attack or humiliate anyone for no good reason, I resented them too much to let myself to become like them in anyway. My experiences later in school, weren’t so dramatic, but socially wasn’t so much better, I had quite a big trouble trying to interact with people and make friends, most of the time I would get a negative response and I couldn’t understand why, that basically killed my social life forever, I just became paranoid, and have problems with it to this day, even though now I’m finally took the commitment to try to solve it at last,before that I mainly tried to understand what happened, and FDR finally hit the nail for me, all now is coming together, and I hope I can come out of these old issues, and finally have a real life. I’ve finally talked to my mom about these things I’ve layed out here that always bothered me and I just never felt it would help to say anything, I felt it would be pointless, she even did listen now, and she actually is making an effort to do better, I’ve also talked to her about the notion of a stateless society and why governments are immoral and can’t work, and considering that she is a retired public sector worker she was quite open minded to the idea to some degree, but of course she’s definetely not planning to drop her retirement salary, and she also wants me to get a public sector job, to have a more secure life like she did. And so one of the reasons I also came here besides getting to know people and exchange ideas, it is to find ways to get out of this situation I'm in And the way I thought about how to do that is seting up my own project, aiming to get bitcoins, and so I'm interested in finding partnership for that. it basically would be a philosphy website, or perhaps an youtube channel, with arts and videos laying out a different perspective in all of the discussion about anarchy, and particularly the role of dealing with others in society and how does that relates to the state and why people felt the need to create it in the first place, I would like to explore that in an artistic narrative so people can really absorb the concept in different ways, if I can find someone interested here it would be awesome to join talents together and colaborate on something I’ll make some other post about this laying out the idea better in the appropriate section of the forum in the future More detailed personal history My mom came to Brazil from Bolivia in the 70's running away from a violent boyfriend, she made her life here as a high office public sector worker, as most people in higher classes in Brazil do to have a "safe life", my father was a chief of police, and was clinicaly deppressed, he told my mom once that he decided to kill himself when he was 18, but thought through and decided to live to see if maybe he could get better, he married my mom, she got pregnant but he didn't want to have children so he demanded her to make an abortion, so she aborted twice, in the third time she lied and carried out the pregnancy and so I was born in 3/8/1985, in 2005 my father after still living with depression decided to kill himself at last, which made my mom very desperate and got into a sort of state of denial, and very interestingly she also said she was "very angry with him", and she really did seemed more angry and frustrated than sad right after the fact, really Coming back to after I was born, my mom made written records of my development as a baby, in there it says that about the time I was already able to walk, when some stranger, or even a friend of hers tryed to come close to speak to me I would look down grab her legs and even through myself face to the floor to avoid it for some reason Growing up, I had problems socializing with people in general as long as I can remember, people around me seemed unnecessarily agressive and competitive for me, that really bothered me, because I couldn't understand what was the deal with that, also I thought everyone was so openly dishonest, I've developed quite a grudge about the process of socializing in general and anything that I associated with it and these early experiences, because to me it was pretty much tied with agression and intimidation, so I've became more of a loner and also quite a cynical person, sort of quiet and reserved kind of personality, in fact I think I can say I've became traumatized with my first years trying to socialize in any place at all, being kindengarten, school, or really anywhere, from my perspective and general feeling it felt like anything I would say or do would always get some form of negative response, either verbal abuse or just rejection, so because of that I've became very paranoid about being rejected, I developed a false self to go around and be accepted, also I've invented very strict rules that I’ve associated with my "success" in some situations. I remember when I was 5 years old I made myself a very strong promise to not ever act like those people were with me, to never lash out or be unnecessarily aggressive with people just because I felt like it without any reazonable justification, that became a formative stone in my personality, both for good and for bad. In my first years in schooI I just hated it so much, it was a expensive private school and children were agressive and competitive and seemed to want to humiliate me and put me down for no reason at all that I could figure, I've felt that from adults too, anywhere, anytime it seemed like that anything I would say atracted a negative response from other kids and even adults, while for me it was just reazonable questioning to others it seemed to be always inconvenient even if it was something that actually was relevant in the moment and even sometimes my point being proven to be correct or relevant people around me just didn't recognize it, that kind of thing also happend with relatives and also my own mother and father sometimes or any other adults so that pretty much made me grow to be very cynical and skeptical just about everything, and also made me extremely self conscious, paranoid and distant in social situations I can remember that only when I was about ten years old, when Ive changed into other less expensive private school that I've felt that I was able to successfully socialize, before that, I had only one or two real friends, but generally felt rejected or ignored, by either kids or adults. But when I was ten, having growing up watching a lot of TV and absorving a lot of stuff from there and also videogames, I was able to be funny, picking up from a lot of references,and also picked up knowledge for general conversations that before was pointless to try to engage, and that's how I socialized there, and for the first time I've felt I was able to make friends and also felt accepted, I was pretty happy, for a long time I've marked that year as the happiest of my life, I've became paranoid about not losing that, to not lose my status of "being accepted" and that's where problems started to grow for my personality development, for one year, I've felt everything was in place in a way I've never felt before, in the next year I began to worry to lose that, because I thought that at any moment my early ears could comeback somehow, or that if I got rejected there I would go back to my former situation as a friendless reject And so I've concentrated my energy in being funny, and began to get really worried if for some reason I'd made a bad joke that could get ridiculed, that was very important for me,so Ive became more and more someone that tryed to please others, and would get internal conflicts about breaking my own silly rules, deliberate things that I had marked as things I wouldn't do, like not talking in this or that situation, not to make a particular kind of joke, etc. My grades in school started to plumet, before that I did fine in grades. So because my grades were getting worse, my mom decided to put me in some other private school, going against my will, because I thought I wouldn't be able to adapt again, I was afraid of change. this new school I went to,reminded more of my early year's school, or at least I thought so. Starting classes there I found myself in a pretty big internal conflict, emotionally for me, being there was sort of like going back to my early stage entering school, so I grew this tremendous fear of being ridiculed, which made me take “safety” measures to not let that happened, I had the desire to make friends and to be the class clown, the funny guy like I was in my other school, but I just couldn’t deal with my fears, I couldn’t confront it, I’ve held the grudge and made myself not act in so many situations I knew I could do something funny or something relevant that would put me on the spot, I held back and kept myself out of attention as much as possible and avoided anything that I desired, I was 12 years old, and I was already interested in girls and all, I recognize that had to do with some social pressure too, because all the other did it quite easily it seemed but for me talking to girls was a pretty big issue, I’ve also experienced humiliation by them and things like that, and those early experiences made too traumatized to try again, I just thought it was impossible. I made a few friends there though, the outcast people you could say, we basically were more nerdy than the others, but I personally knew there was no necessity for a divide in class, but the divide happened anyway, but there was no fights or any direct conflict, but there was also no integration too. The whole situation was very stressive for me, I felt the desire to be a normal young person and make friends and get girls, but anything in that direction I just blocaded for fear of my early experiences, fear of getting to a point I no longer knew what to do or had a good frame of reference to guide myself on what to expect or how to act facing situations of conflict I’ve experienced before, I avoided situations I knew I actually could do something, always justifying myself something really bad could happened, even though I knew rationally not much could really happened, I had this strong desire and urge to understand what went wrong in the past, it really held me back, I wanted to understand it. I pretty much didn’t want to live, I wanted to understand, that of course was very stressive, because in the back of my head I got the sense that I was pretty much wasting my life, that I was throwing away my youth and all that romantic notion of those first early experiences with girls and all. All of that was when I was 12 years old, in that same year I’ve found in a medical exam that I had diabetes, I wasn’t obese or anything, and didn’t eat compulsively, I had a little bit of fat but nothing outside of normality. Strangely, when me and my family found about the diabetes, my mom seemed much more sad than me, she cried, I didn’t. So my years in school went on with that internal conflict, unresolved, I became a mixture of my two states I had been before: the rejected unpopular kid and the funny, popular one, neither of them fully in charge,I was the funny one with my circle of friends and some others, but completely shut for no real good reason in other situations, I think that represented in some way the situation I saw with adults and others that didn’t made sense for me. So I graduated in school and went to college, I got into Arts college because the only thing I could think of that I liked and knew how to do was drawing. So I went there carrying all these previous unresolved conflicts, but trying to present myself as a cool guy to be accepted even though I’d always remained skeptical about any true relationship with anyone, and also I would avoid anything I really desired, like excell in my artwork and stand out in the crowd, perhaps geting the girl I’d like to get, etc. But when I was 19, I just couldn’t bare anymore having not ever even touched a girl or anything, I was getting paranoid with the idea of maybe dying and not ever experiencing that, but I just couldn’t make myself to engage in talking to any girl in college, or anywhere at all, so I decided to lose my virginity with a prostitute. It was actually good, despite the whole situation being a bit sad After that, when I was 20, eventually at some party, with the help of my friends I was able to get a girl without paying. In that same year, also my father killed himself. In some other party in college I was able to get another girl, so in all 5 years of college I’ve managed to get at least one girl there, she was ok physically, sort of short and a bit overweight at the time, but she was a cool girl, and after sometime she started taking care of her looks and got really pretty,we went out just a few times and that was it. So I’ve graduated in college and pretty much didn’t know exactly what to do with my life, I was(and still am) living in my mothers house, I basically lived in a state of inercia, I didn’t have the drive to start or engage in anything meaningful, in fact, I kept myself avoiding anything in that sense, because I was hung in past issues, and I couldn’t move on, I’ve made courses in webdesigning, comics illustrations, got a few jobs like the one in animation studio and in a comic book studio, but sort of by luck and kindness of others, I still felt like I was in a state of failure to launch, but on purpose actually, since I wasn’t making any real effort to launch at all. So in the midst of all of my general state of confusion and lack of action in life in general, eventually I found out about the freedomain radio channel, and started following it. I’ve always liked to think critically and to rationalize about things, I also always liked science shows on tv, and science magazines, and so I was never afraid to face challenging ideas. After a few years watching and listening to the podcasts, I decided to do the right thing and started donating. Going back to the time after college, the next years I spent doing not much, a few free lance jobs and projects that didn’t went anywhere, did a webdesign course among other things, started playing in a rocknroll band. After all these things not developing into anything meaningfull, I decided to do something with my life. so having quite a lot of doubts I decided to start a grafic design college,and through there I got a job recently doing videos and folders in a company that offers assistance to public sector workers on dealing with the taxation of towns and helps writing laws. Lately also, I have been dating a girl at last, wich is very good. Watching FDR certainly had a big role in these improvements I’m making, so I’m really,really thankful for Stefan’s work, and I’m so sorry I can’t donate more, I’d like to, but unfortunately I really can’t for now. ---------------- thanks again for the attention and sorry for the long text