MysterionMuffles

link doesn't work though I would appreciate if it did, as some UPB aspects are tough to understand

That's kind of what I suspect too. Coming from the perspective that we are all ultimately ONE and cut from the same cloth, I guess some parents hate seeing a reflection of their own free selves in their children. So to punish them in any way they're actually punishing the lost part of themselves that they have to make an effort to bury beneath the core of their being. I suppose it's freedom envy because it is usually the most overly self conscious type of parents who are the most abusive. They were scrutunized for acting in such a free way, so they do all they know and punish individual free thought and action.

He's speaking in a general sense in relevance to the topic. He didn't specifically say that his parents were horrible people...

Yeah a hand slap does achieve shit in short term, but in long term kind of breaks the physical bond a little bit. For instance, my neice is usually peaceful and only gets violent if you pick her up while she's trying to play and you had interrupted her. She'll just kick and thrash if you're holding her too tight and even knows how to press her arm against your throat while she shakes out of your grip. Otherwise, she would never initiate any violence on anyone. She runs up to you and to get your attention, she just pats you gently or makes a baby sound. However, one time like I mentioned in the first page, my mom had slapped her on the hand for dropping food on the floor, and ever since then she has never been the same towards my mom again. She still loves her company as much as she used to, except now my neice feels like it's okay to smack my mom in the head with a VHS tape just for the hell of it. Thankfully that was one time, but in return my mom slapped her hand again, except lighter than before because I could tell she was wrestling with her conscience on how to react while rubbing her throbbing head. I haven't seen my neice hurt her in any way just yet and I hope it stays that way, but man...the way she hurts her own mother makes me question what happens when she's not in my care BUT ANYWAY So the moment my mom slapped her hand for dropping the food, my neice DID stop dropping the food on the floor...FOR THAT DAY. She STILL does it on occasion because shit, she's just a baby and doesn't know how to communicate when she doesn't want the food anymore, or if she just takes pleasure in seeing things fall to this magical shiny thing low below her feet. She also does this thing where her eyes are still hungrier than her stomach, so she tends to over feed her self to the point that she keeps biting and chewing, inevitably spitting the food out on the floor repeatedely. What I've done to correct this was simply notice when she's about to do it, rush over to her and let my palm underneath her mouth, and she quickly learned to just spit out the mushy morsels into my hand. It was hard the first few weeks, but more and more, she just lets the food stick out the edge of her lips until I go over to her and put my hand out, and THEN she spits it out. I don't know why my cousin has to freak out every time she spits food out onto the floor...like get a damn tissue, wipe it off and get on with your day instead of saying "you're giving me a hard time. Don't be like this! ONE!...TWO!!! HEY!!!" Like really? How demeaning is that shit? Cool your damn fuckhole, clean it up, and just deal with it when you can see it coming from a mile away.

LOL what the? who are these guys?

I need to share this video on Facebook tomorrow morning. People gotta see this lol

omg it's so weird! it's like the government "health agent" had some good facts about food, and also seemed caring at first, but as soon as he was writing penalties and whatnot--it's scary how submissive some people were. thankfully some laughed and could see how ridiculous that would be if it were real

Dear God...I had to close and roll my eyes when I read this. I can't imagine how messed up it is to have a mother so over protective over you, despite of what happened to you in daycare. Did she ever suspect anything happened in those hell holes or have you ever said anything about it? I don't want to be a dick and say that you should've or could've, because I know that kind of alienation only causes a child to withdraw. I understand. You were probably scared as shit. I am horribly sorry that you had to go through all that. I am glad to hear you found any possible avenue that provides you with clarity. Welcome to the FDR Board, you are amongst one of the most insightful communities out there on the world wide interwebz. Timid or not, I think you'll find it really helpful in engaging in the philosophica conversation. The fact that you were open enough to share all that is already a good sign that you've overcome some aspects of timidness, so I hope you continue in that journey.

Tis tis. Ugh...those creeps who rule 34 them is what drove me far away from it at first. Also not to mention the arrogant Bronies who are too in your face about it. But those are all pretty rare in number compared to genuine fans, whether they adhere to the label or not. I personally don't because it's kind of limitting. I almost wish it was my after school cartoon when I was growing up. And to think of all the hours I wasted on Dragon Ball Z where it took 3 episodes for a guy to charge up one powerful move. ONE powerful move that could devastate an entire city into pieces, but would still not be enough to manage a scratch on the current bad guy they all had to fight at a collective unit. I guess that's why I'm so comfortable watching it now as an adult, I know that it would have made me less about macho bravado bullshit if I got into it as a kid. I was never one to care what people thought anyway, especially since I even liked Sailor Moon. Hell, it afforded me conversation with a cute girl in my class back then anyway! Besides, I tend to find female driven narrative to be more interesting for some reason I can't explain. If it's done right, it can have a pretty deep introspective on relationships, which is yet another selling point of MLP: FiM, the way the characters all relate to each other in their own unique and individual ways amongst the Mane 6.

Um...ok? I feel horribly threatened, disrespected, and confused now.

case in point. If I was being passive agressive, I'd be dismissing all of your arguments as stupid and false. Did you not read the rest of my comment? Were you instantly offended from my first paragraph? Honestly, how does one so stuck up as you end up in a forum that promotes rational thinking? Makes no sense to me.

I return your argument. If I slap you for making that argument, will you understand it is a type of loving discipline? It shouldn't traumatize you. I'll only slap you a little, it won't cause severe pain. It will be an expression of my love for you as a fellow person. We have a bond of care between us, so it's not some kind of huge deal. I don't want to discipline you, but you don't seem to understand how much danger your argument puts you in. Don't you see? I need to slap you for your own good. It doesn't mean you're any less of a person or that I don't like you. It just means I cannot reason with your young mind (as it cannot rationalize danger), and you need to be slapped into not making this argument again. It's not abuse. It's not assault or rape. Associating assault with something like a small, harmless slap is wrong to do. /thread If you slapped me, I'd kick your ass, but you aren't my parents. You don't have any bond with me, you don't pay for the clothes I wear, and you don't feed me, or put a roof over my head, throw me birthday parties, take me to school, care for me when I'm sick, take me for Icecream, and all of the other things my parents did. There is no understanding or relationship outside of this forum between you or I. You CANNOT take the parent out of the equation, and you can't put yourself in the role of a parent. You can't put me in the role of your child. These associasion games are stupid. If you can't understand why slapping wrists of your child, or spanking, is okay then don't spank. It's not abuse though. It's sick that you don't have an appreciation for what abuse, "really" is. But don't put yourself between a family, because you're supposed to be an anarchist, not a statist, although in my family a statist has no authority to involve themself in how we do things in it, either. well judging by how hostile some of your posts can be, and how you have a knack for projecting your own passive agressiveness on other people (I've seen you do it twice by now)--it is clear to me now that your own physical damage as a child has had adverse affects on you to be as confrontational as you are right now. Despite of how well you try to defend your parents and justify their actions, you fail to recognize how much of your arguments actually have anything to do with what I've said or what Arius said, but much more to do with unloading your real pent up agression towards your parents for treating you the way you did, thus externalizing it on us anonymous internet folk. But what do I know? Your parents did provide for you with all the things you listed, so I am not in the business of demonizing them, especially if my gripe is with you. Or should I say not you, but your continual ignoring of my base arguments--meanwhile all this time I have been adapting some of the reasoning your provided that has got me to second guess some of my own firm beliefs--you simply reject all that I say as false without considering any of it. For instance you say that a simple hand slap is NOT abuse, and although I don't agree with you on that, it does let me consider if the extremity of physical pain caused CAN actually make the different between good parenting and abusive parenting. All I'm trying to tell you is that although a hand slap isn't as bad as full out beating the shit out of a kid, it is still a violation of the child's sense of physical safety and comfort, and that of course does affect them mentally, whether they acknowledge it consciously or not. Is it so much for you to take that in consideration so that our argument can take on more progress, instead of circling back and forth to a dead horse you've beaten to a pulp? Now I can't expect you to tell me I am right about anything I've said, especially since you do seem firm in your beliefs and I respect that, but I do wish you would at least consider some of the arguments I brought forth. Ya know, instead of writing them off as icky and gross because it makes you uncomfortable that I compare child abuse to adult rape.

I return your argument. If I slap you for making that argument, will you understand it is a type of loving discipline? It shouldn't traumatize you. I'll only slap you a little, it won't cause severe pain. It will be an expression of my love for you as a fellow person. We have a bond of care between us, so it's not some kind of huge deal. I don't want to discipline you, but you don't seem to understand how much danger your argument puts you in. Don't you see? I need to slap you for your own good. It doesn't mean you're any less of a person or that I don't like you. It just means I cannot reason with your young mind (as it cannot rationalize danger), and you need to be slapped into not making this argument again. It's not abuse. It's not assault or rape. Associating assault with something like a small, harmless slap is wrong to do. /thread

the machine Raj and Howard used on the Big Bang Theory seemed more practical than a straw

Yeah you read that correctly. For those who don't know, there's this huge phenomenon where teenage to middle aged men (and of course some adult females) are becoming die hard fans of the kids cartoon My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Although aimed towards little girls, there's a huge appreciation coming from such an unintended audience who are now creating remixes of the show's music and are also generating original animation in its style, art, and fan fiction. Anything you can think of, there is original content created based on the show. These people call themselves "Bronies" or "Pegasisters" and are pushing some comfort boundaries in society mainly because...for crap's sake the show is intended for little girls! So you wonder, why is there such a huge following in the adult demographic? The easiest way I can put it is by comparing it to Disney Pixar movies like Toy Story. They are intended for little kids, but there's something meaningful to the script writing that is also mature, honest and intelligent on a level that even adults can connect with. Sometimes it's the adults who are the only ones who can pick up on the more personal themes presented, at least on a conscious level. Basically, My Little Pony in its exterior looks just like any other kids cartoon, but if you watch it with an open mind--even if it doesn't turn out to be your cup of tea--you could still at least appreciate its unique art style, and the production value of the animation despite it being Flash. For those who decide to dig deeper, they can even appreciate the sense of humour and philosophical lessons taught within the context of friendship being "magic." And the best thing about is that it's not even as girly as you would expect where all the ponies just sit around and have tea all day while talking about the boys they like. They actually tackle some social issues, get into some serious conflicts as well as delve into self knowledge. I shit you not, FDR, this is one of the rare few cartoons where you could even find character development, which is also one of the bigger reasons why people are so drawn to it. Of course such a group is under scrutiny by the likes of Fox News and other judgemental media that assume it's part of some hidden pedophile agenda or vast conversion to homosexuality, or just plain lack of maturity in the adult audience of the show. I think Bronies and Pegasisters are pretty brave people to remain comfortable with their interest in the show (the toylines is pushing it, but thats just my own personal bias), and are changing social norms without even taking action! They just BE who they are without much of a care what other people think. I wanted to know if anyone else on this board enjoys this show, or has seen it and disliked it, or if anyone had any idea about it at all. I'm also interested if people could debunk the psychology and rationality behind it to be some sort of mental dysfunction, or hell if it's even a positive thing that this things going on and it is absolutely okay to enjoy something so simple, yet so profound.

Yeah there's a Blue opaque circle next to the podcast titles when you haven't listened to them yet on your iTunes or iDevice, then half of it turns white if you've listened far into it, and the compltely disappears when you've listened to them in full.

Ok I get that my comparisons are putting you off, but are you at least acknowledging my main argument that a hand slap STILL CAUSES physical discomfort that provides no real benefit to the person receiving it? Again it's different from the pain of dentistry because that pain can be avoided if gums are healthy enough to withstand the sharp tools used, and of course any physical discomfort felt from receiving a scaling results in the blatant end in improving dental health.

Yeah you're right, a hand slap is not abuse. In the same way, grabbing a random woman's ass is not rape. They are both gateways to possible abuse in the future if the perpetrator feels that they can get away with it on a regular basis. Although they are definitely not their more extreme counterparts, they are still violiations of a person's physical comfort that does cause psychological damage.

I downloaded this podcast to listen to, and as much as I love the philosophical parenting podcasts, this one turned out to BE a philosophical parenting podcast instead of the one it was aptly named for. Don't know if it's the same case with anyone else, but maybe the files and titles for these two different podcasts have been switched, or even duplicated, but named as something different.

Yeah. I'm not sure if I mentioned this earlier about him posting a video about a baby getting beaten up with a pillow, when I mentioned it to him and told him it was the same thing, he said the slap on the hand was minor in comparison to that. I did say something to the effect that abuse is abuse no matter the amount, so I really hope that was the more cornerstone argument I made as opposed to the whole porn star thing lol, because even I admit that is taking it too far on a very effect based argument.

Fortunately/Unfortunately Why?

Apparently my niece hasn't been hit or yelled at ever since I had that talk with my cousin's husband. The one where I said "she's only 5 slaps away from becoming a porn star," though I do wish I could run deeper than that and tell him how much of a good father I know he could be, if he'd only just stick with that same peaceful enthusiasm he had when she was much more little. Whether I played any part in that or not, I am happy to even see them deal with her peacefully when she throws tantrums or refuses to get dressed. They're silent, forgiving and just hold her still as gently as they can. Though I don't know what happens during the week when she's out of my care, I hope my assumptions are right, especially ever since my cousin confided in me and my family about her declining relationship with her so called husband. My speculation is that the more distant the two become, the more likely it is for them to take out their frustrations on my niece. I hope to God* that they are starting to work out their differences and remember why the got married and had this kid in the first place. So thank you all for your input everyone! And to the guy who posted just a bunch of links, I've listened to Stef's conversations with Dayna and they were really helpful. As for the books and whatnot, I don't think I require them that much. But thanks for the reccomendations nonetheless. *I use the term loosely...

Shallow and unfulfilling. Surface connectivity is alright, but when it comes to deeper things, they're just judgemental and close minded.

All my life, my parents would hype up church as the ultimate family activity because it will teach us to be better people. Even though of course I could never stand a single droned out word dripping out of the priest's mouth. Every Sunday my brother and I would be rushed to get dressed, be good and go to church, and at some point, we always had to have the same argument: isn't God supposed to accept us as we are? Why are we trying to impress him with fancy clothes? Didn't the people Jesus interact with dress in tattered garb? (Obviously as a kid, my vocabulary wasn't that awesome, but that was the basis of what I would talk about) This carried on for a while and our interest in church began to decline further and further as we got older. There was no one influencing us, and even though he and I didn't communicate as much yet as kids, we both began to question religiousity and distance ourselves from the imaginary obligation to have to pray and go to church. Maybe having to pray the rosary every night during Easter time would be a pointless endeavour to adhere to "a family that prays together stays together." Meanwhile throughout the day we would all barely say a meaningful word to each other, and apparently chanting these repetitive prayers in unison was supposed to make us a better family? Even as a kid I knew it was fundamentally wrong to believe in the fantasy that we would magically become a good family just because of religious events we were forced to go together. Even at home. Our parents would concern us over why we weren't willing to go to church as much anymore or why we make a big fuss out of doing the rosary. I would rebuke with, "instead of going to church, why can't we just...talk?" Plain and simple as that was, it became the prominent concern in my heart for years to come. I always did wonder why we couldn't just sit down and have good family talks and bond realistically, instead of hoping that unified chanting would do the trick. Anyways, long story short, one Sunday, my brother and I were playing Mario Kart 64 which we rented from Blockbuster. As usual, we were being hassled to get into our Sunday best, but no, WE WANTED TO FINISH THE DAMN RACE FIRST. So much like any family situation where kids are being herded around, my mom would quickly and quietly (at first) yell at us to get ready. We would whine, "wait, we're almost finished," in that childish tone we all know and love. I think we kept starting new races to put it off some more until the yelling escalated in volume and in quantity of words, threatening us about the possibility of Hell and our souls not being saved or some other religious jargon. Our eyes were glued to the screen because it was a close race, but then my mom ripped the cartridge out of the N64, threw it against the wall and yelled at us to "get ready, we're going to be late! God doesn't like that!" Whether we went to church or even received a beating for this, I cannot remember. All I remember is this isolated moment where all at once, I wondered my parents' sense of morality. They tell us to respect other people's property, but there was my mom almost destroying something we RENTED from a video store. They tell us that going to church will make us better people, yet we were being berated to go in such a way that is just...wow! My mind is full of fuck from just thinking about it. If they were so righteous, wouldn't they have persuaded us to go in a much more reasonable way? Couldn't my mom or dad easily say, "it's time to go, but when we get back you can play as long as you want." Hell even bribe us with a McDonald's treat or something afterwards, which used to be our little family ritual almost every Sunday prior to that. It was that morning where my faith began to decline...the other moment that sealed my fate as an Athiest came years later. When I was in grade 9, I was involved in a petty love triangle drama where my friend and I had a fist fight over a girl. Their relationship was going downhill because my friend wasn't ready or even interested in being with a girl just yet (and to my dismay, other friends and I had to help him overcome his fear of the cooties and hook up with her in the first place). The first time I met her, my job was to boost my friend, but our conversation got derailed and she happened to admit that she became attracted to me now. And instead of being a real man, I thought the virtuous thing to do was stay on course with helping my reluctant friend score a girlfriend when he didn't even want to. They hooked up all thanks to me being far too much of a White Knight than I can tolerate, but always in the background, her and I always seemed to be a better fit as we were more sexually ready than my friend ever was at that time. But whatever, they continued on with their relationship and in the background I would be her shoulder to cry on. (Ugh I know how immature and ridiculous this is sounding, so trust me when I say I know a hell lot better now) Eventually she started cheating on him with me, he found out, and thus came the fist fight that would end their relationship, and weeks later her and I just had a one time fling...the reward for all this needless drama was just that: needless. My faith in religion had been wavering for past few years, but I decided to go to confession for only the second time in my life since the first forced one when I was younger. At which point of course, I wondered why the fuck they were teaching kids to doubt themselves and view themselves as "sinful" even though we've been barely taught correctly the difference between wrong and right by our peers, teachers, parents and parishoners. When I went into that confession booth, I was expecting a heartful and helpful conversation with a trusted "leader" in morality and whatnot, but no. None of that would come to pass. I confessed with every ounce of my being that I had betrayed a friend and treated a girl as an object of lust, which was still wrong even though she was putting her self out there as one. And what did the priest tell me to do to get God's forgiveness? 1 Our Father 3 Hail Mary's and 1 Glory be to the FUCKING Father I just knew didn't exist anymore. It didn't make me feel any better and it didn't correct the situation. It wasn't until years later when I made my peace with my friend and that girl did I ever rid myself of the guilt I harbored for what I've done.

Oh my God, someone else noticed it! I knew it was her mother that raped her the night before the show. Lily said "sweet girl" which is the same thing her mother says. I guess Nina was so damaged that the only way to put up with the rape, she had to fantasize it as Lily doing her. I mean the signs were all there where her mom wanted to undress her and Nina was so subtle, but defensive nonetheless.