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Hi, I'm guessing you haven't been listening / watching many of his podcasts, videos on peaceful parenting, or found the 'photocopier effect' to be relatable. It comes up quite frequently when single mothers(step dads), physical - sexual abuse(What a burden), child beating in the black community (and others too), women passing 'their expiry date' are mentioned/call-in and the application of 'fog horn' is also very common. Also, I'm not trying to convince you one way or the other. I perfectly see the connection, logic. Hint(how I'd distill what I came to grasp): Enough unprocessed suffering has the tendency to make a person immune to healing / mourning / curiosity, allocation of guilt where it is due. Therefore making the 'it was all done to me, the world's deterministic bs' mentality act as a 'getaway car' from reality, further strengthening various cognitive dissonances at each passing milestone. Barnsley

Hi man, Looots of people go through similar motions, so perhaps it'd curious (consider it, see what happens) to think about just how natural all the hesitation, even if there's available guidance/task list seemingly in your possession. After having read your long-ish post, and meanwhile too I couldn't pinpoint how gratitude is part of your life and what existing 'unshakeable pillars' are there for you to fall back on/back you up. Y' know, when an explorer's skills/carefully packed equipment in his backpack are essential for him 'when things go awry'. He is partly an explorer because he's been preparing to support himself, fallback on things he'd learnt prior to setting out on the perilous & unique experience of conquering 'his mountain'... life. I am saying these things because : 1. Don't beat yourself up, it's a waste of time doing so if you could be working on stuff that rather made you feel you were on the' right track at least'. (I'd infer, that's where a large chunk of your anxiety originated from. But you should be the attentive-detective who through objective observation spots what's to be spotted... anyway.) 2. Are you, your own best friend? Are your expectations reasonable to your own standards? (no/broken tools but expectation of a job done = ? what do you think of employers like that for example?) 3. In a recent call-in-show FDR 3901 - 02:15:00 starting - Jacob - I think you should listen to it. There's a very good pointer on what's it like 'feeling a push for a leap and contemplating still' "There's a right time to do things." Barnsley P.S: (be your best friend man, take the best care of yourself, listen, ask, clarify just looking for understanding especially when you notice... the doubts. They are there for a reason. Regardless of their true validity, remember we fear the unknown to protect ourselves from harm, predators. Of course you are fearless in a zoo, but will nervously jump to any noise out in the wild. It's natural. The good thing is, you can make your own fire, protection and after that you won't be paralysed. - - - self-talk - - - i.e.: If I 'hear' myself saying doubtful stuff to myself. (The other day I wanted to applaud myself for achieving a small success in progressing with my project. Then came a snarky remark in my mind belittling and instilling fear/doubts in me projecting the possibility of sad failure. I noticed and put it where it belonged. Making my next doubt come up with more reasons and less emotional charge because I had been asking for constructiveness... so my mind shifted to doing ask I kindly asked/explained before in my own self-talk to myself. MECO system, immensely helpful if you ask for help.) I said to myself: Thanks for pointing it out but it isn't helping me feel better, get ahead. I suppose 'you' want me get better that's why you came up with the doubts. What constructive ideas do you propose? I will listen. Please say it and I will do my best understanding. What useful information is there I should know? Let's do it together. Don't worry if you are wrong or partially correct. I am patient and constructive. - - - self-talk - - - Be patient and remember... 5% improvement is better than no improvement. You might not believe it but things are going to get easier as you reconnect with your wisdom. By the way, it's why people can be so sure of themselves. They just know how to discuss and evaluate doubts to the point where there's full understanding and perfect clarity. It's learnable, same as riding a bicycle. I suppose you don't think much about falling off anymore, you know to use your muscles to keep balanced.)

Hi @MysterionMuffles Is it possible that the target audience of Stefan's could be generally characterised as 'above average IQ'? If it was true, would you say that people with a greater intellectual vigor lean towards getting a better understanding rather than a quick fix? People like those above two could have thought / read / worked already on those dilemmas relatively more, wouldn't you say? Don't you think they already heard a 1000times 'take responsibility' and 'it's you, not else'...? I might not 'resonate' with you in saying stuff like 'reason & evidence' is the most responsible approach, that's why the multitude of metaphors, anecdotes he has purposefully chosen to mention in relation to the core message. Sure he could condense (he has already btw) each hour to a minute or so but than it'd be indistinguishable from any other superficial 'motivational' speaker and would leave the gaping holes (I for one felt that watching the vid) people feel when encountering much repeated 'hallmark' cards, quite a few you've spoken yourself. It takes humility and hard-work to want to make a message not just 'digestible to the masses' but personal to the degree that you sort of able to see 'the arc of a person' his/her 'footsteps through a path'. Aaaand, don't get me wrong... Wishing you succeeded at doing what you do. It's just the superficial nature '1 dime a dozen' - level of uniqueness pep talk, then 'common' enticing language encouraging the growth of your channel (which I do hope you grow), I just immediately disregarded everything I heard thinking the only purpose of the video was created for is attracting viewership... no backed up arguments just a slogan. The over-hyped body language, The unilateral 'fake positivity' (implying, you've got no fears, doubts), no honesty in 'leveling' with the viewer ... etc. Like I said, I doubt my message will resonate and since you actually made a video while I haven't... well, I shouldn't be hypocritical about the 'doing something' part. I hope I could explain why I rather follow, read, connect to individuals who 'hash out' their thought processes and don't consider your content share-worthy as of yet. Keep us updated if you made any changes, maybe some of us will re-visit. Or not. Barnsley

Yes. Bloody three's (recurring theme, just as entropy...). Perhaps it helps if I stated: 'Teaching the youth about the existence of monsters isn't to raise awareness of the dangers/elevate the main character but to introduce concepts of 'counterforces' and the endless sea of possibilities/opening dialogue (from a very young age) you can only get by acquiring curiosity.' Courage stems from conviction. Conviction from the same source as willpower. Am I going astray, here?! Barnsley

I immensely applauded you time and time again when reading. No. Disregard will to power. (hawk eyes) Barnsley

I think you miss-read/internalised or perhaps extrapolated too broadly, given the purpose... examples below. Dear @ShindouHikaru 1. Please say what YOU believe (preferably practice too)... I kindly request, if I may. I am interested in your own thoughts / thoughts you hold valuable and aren't quotations, necessarily(I love A.I. don't get me wrong, but want to speak with humans). I'm grateful for your input, just wondering retention, caveats, 'personal colours' all the good stuff. RTR basically. a. Would you like to use the 'format' facilitated at the beginning of the thread? 2. My aim is for a better understanding of the source, reinforcement(s) / dynamics are secondary furthermore (the way I see it) dependent on the quality of the primary goal's integrity... though indicative(nevertheless lower in the logical hierarchy). i.e.: ( Circumventing using recipes of large leaps with shortcuts, deals worse long term consequences than inching in the direction that gives you more understanding (gradually) of the itinerary for your journey you had set out to explore. Does it not?! ) I didn't say I wished to change. You're right, there are things I am working on, making them better. It's sad to live a life reactionary like. This doesn't work, I do that. More of this? Do that!... Where I'm coming from IS: What if you SAW where the answers were locked up/awaited and you could work hard to deserve their trials, happily reconnecting with the source AT THE ORIGIN... goosebumps? Do stuff, say things! I will always listen if you do virtuosly, Regards, Barnsley P.S: No clue who you 'is', reciprocity really... You might want to learn about how synaptic wiring meddles in kinaesthetic cognitive functions. Practical example: Take a pen and paper. Write a question at the top, (set a countdown to 3 minutes) you seek breakthrough/epiphany and change writing hands (notice how I didn't establish right/left prominence? Anyhow, use 'the other hand' once you secured 'the question'). Write constantly during the time frame, anything that comes. Anything. Doodles too... keep it flowing. Finally, be prepared to be blown away by the outcome.

... keep it coming, reload that trusty sawed off 'loudspeaker' of yours, I'll signal if to me the 'prey seems to be unaffected' ... Regarding this "snipet", after me having replied that : to this orinal response of yours : So here's how I see numbers for example. They are useful abstractions, though don't physically existing. When we use them, manipulate using their concepts we 'personalise' them. Because if you compare my concept of infinite, what and how it pops into your mind is different to mine and vice versa. Their mathematical value remains (of course) but you might see an ever expanding hotel chain(khmTrump) , while I loathe the smart parents of my date for allowing me to sit only half a distance closer each time I meet with their daughter compared to the last occasion. The moment you internalised / living the function of a concept, you personalised it. The effects don't change the original 'value' but the unique choices you make using them distinguish you from everyone else. Tieing it back: The closer the options that certain identities allow for, the easier to then identify with/create an Ethos around them,(to the observer) the easier to regard the manifestation of certain traits of that 'story' as unique qualities of an Ethos having an influence on the participants. But perhaps you can see why I think Ethos is born from the realisation of personal choice, birth of identity = choice. It's then maintained through consistency and integrity, especially when the Ethos evolves, people abandon.. etc. 1. It's all 'from below-up' organisation. and such 2. Mixing with / new information requires the building blocks transform or exit. so it's 3. Enduring if it's established on virtues (ideals that require hard work and dedication while can't be fully reached) because those won't change over time and their effects only increase over time. Barnsley

I always had the sense that he wasn't truly honest. (my personal assertion) In life, I try to follow the same principle to share whomever likes 'equilaterally' hence we're sharing ideas. But when I remember multi-level marketing course realms... I find it hard to distinguish him from other 'movement initiators' telling you half the truth / price you need to pay. Although I would only go as far as he's always keeping his best cards for himself. Can't blame him for that, he's an un-feeling businessman. (in my perception) Barnsley

True. I think of it in 3s, as the second one the last time I thought about it and the third right now! (making connection with my personal experiences help me remember more details, hopefully learn more) Nathaniel Branden - Sentence completion It is making me reflect a lot lately, recommend it wholeheartedly. Would you say, that by taking over other people's debts they don't have to experience the negative consequences of their bad decisions? In a sense they cheat 'being wrong'? So my next question about friendship is, what happens when you loose your investment? Same as in buying up someone's debt who don't delivers? My view on it is that it's almost as good if it(investment) comes to fruition, but much worse when doesn't (easier to recover money, but you'll never forget a betrayal)... my take, anyway. I am not as good at specifics, so I praise you for providing the referential, much appreciated. (I remembered it as 'in theory, you can get in touch with anyone in the world through a max of 5 individuals') You might be mesmerised by how aptly the PARETO PRINCIPLE describe worth in correlation with 'base of producers'. I occasionally wonder if it has anything to do with an 'unknown dynamic, God in the gaps... etc' and it's 'sense of humour'. Even entropy? but in an orderly fashion? Someone is obsessed about micromanagement. Haha. Nevertheless it's observable, going back in time too. (~80/~20) For an experiment : Is it true that you wrote the 80% of your posts to 20% of the people you came in contact with? Aaaand... do you see now, why I think it matters little what group you're in but what value you contribute in actual terms? Reverse that and say, you're the individual who's leaving might reduce the total worth of a group by a factor or two? (you'd probably want to leave that group as it 'needs' you more than you 'need' them) It's an idea. Don't get obsessed with it, but keep it in mind! (telling myself, really) Variety, great. That means responsiveness(flexibility = adaptation). Common ground = fantastic, it simplifying communication, increasing effectiveness... these are all great goals to have, wonderful ideals, perfect plans. Barnsley

Because 'avalanche' Barnsley

Hello, I'm gonna be frank and say... your post seems like 'fishing'. (I can be wrong, not afraid to withdraw or apologise but it has to be in line with reason & evidence) It's all optional, feel free to unwind the yet-hidden-thought-process of yours if you wish with other than catchy slogans(this one instance I am not just making personal assertions, you are broad in your wording, both the intro and reasoning - I'll put examples below). I'd be interested to know why would you want to ask(Isn't what people with a functional brain do good enough? Are you in possession of some great arguments?... many more) , given that 'philosophical individuals' probably treat issues with reason & evidence. I certainly hope so. [philosophy is for prevention by the way, not coercion or survival under duress - Are you suggesting there had been a greater prevention, you think that'd be better due to reason X?]. Please, provide an example. I know what I think in connection with what you'd referenced, but there's no marker as to why those mentioned would be intriguing to you. Just a 'negative'. I am asking because I have no point of comparison, reference, indicator due to the word 'idea' is... well, I'm sure we both agree can mean quite a few things. i.e.: 'common sense', 'values', 'vision'... they stand pretty straight but up close you realise... bland as an English sausage, don't they?! Sorry... this is a negative statement. yet again. You're saying 'what's bad' but there's no mention of 'what's better' or why it would be worth to be better. What are your standards? Why would you want to get in the way of life as it is now? Maybe, probably... I hope not, the only person who is NOT seeing you in your post is me?! I dunno. Hope I helped. Take it with a pinch of salt :-) Barnsley

While the sentiment is praise-worthy, posting it the way you recommend it certainly diminishes it's value to a 'hallmark card', to a simple postcard with lessened 'connective' potential. At least that's why I automatically delete and filter messages with a broad-ish aim. Take my comment for what it's worth. I just think case-by-case is the attentive, caring way to go. Barnsley

To my knowledge there's no war in Algeria. Shouldn't the usual route be towards France? Has the route of people flocking into Europe shifted to Spain? Spain jails hundreds of migrants from Africa. Barnsley

Hi @meetjoeblack I might be wrong here, totally missing the point of your approach and if you think I'm trying to practice arbitration it isn't my true aim. I am being transparent so that you see my point. I wish to have a reasonable and calm discussion if doable with all parties presenting their arguments without attacking the character of the other. Feel free to do so otherwise, but may I ask you this: Wouldn't you agree it's universally preferable staying within the boundaries of respectful manners? We all just are curious and want to better understand the importance of the message of the other, wouldn't you say? Barnsley

Hahaha! No, you misunderstood or I wasn't clear. Probably the later. Yeah, the later. My bad. I tried to tell you some of my amateur experiences about running things in small(I do have some experience, though very limited) as if I had contracted someone 'ought to be a real CEO'. My idea was that in that way I was going to be able to better show you/'transmit' what few valuable experience I gained. I wasn't a big CEO. (nevertheless I think you should treat yourself with that seriousness in any of your own endeavours anyway.) Sorry for that! Besides, did you get what I probably learned by doing things and how reading books related to that? Barnsley

[I'll have to digest what you provided, will write on some of the topics later, but wanted to give you a quick update first.] Some of the hard lessons I encountered... Books are only sold if they are a good read for the target audience. (No badly written books ever became influencers of life changing decisions.) So what you read in any book is always geared towards something while intentionally distanced from it's anti-thesis. Not being aware of that is just as well 'fandom'. People respond to incentives. More of the positive scenarios they experience the more strong the link becomes, insulating them from trying to experience deviations. (Itself it's neutral : equally can be a positive or a negative. Only depending on your values what you perceive worth to you = direction you are 'travelling'.) +Probably you remember me asking you about age&breaking habits correlation. So add that here, also. When I first started living the ideas I had been able to retain (retention is another huge issue - later... ) it quickly dawned on me: - The CEO of my company wasn't happy and willing to fail steadily (at varying degrees, but in creative new ways... sarcasm,creatively :-) while maintaining a high enough morale. He seemed to shrink over time. - The CEO also was continously baffled at how 'stupid' people were to not see the brilliance and novelty we'd been promising and why everyone was so suspicious all the time. - He frequently sighed while saying to himself the phrase: "Are there no more reliable people left in the world?" - Upon finally realising, a product is 5%, marketing & sales account for 95% was the last blow and he withdrew... His reasoning was, I'm the CEO, no salesperson... I have no experience selling things. I lead people. Can't work with sub-par professionals. I guess you figured out, that CEO was me. I just thought it would be easier to depict my view on my lessons through a story, in the third person. Don't think of anything big or fancy but I learned valuable lessons. Books are just books. Think of this. If your life was your Company, You need the best CEO you can get. The type that can sell(convince), motivate(focus/guide), persevere(eyes on the ball) and understands that without failing enough there's no true learning, retention... What would you be able to do if you were that person in charge of your life-company? Barnsley

Thumbs up on the update, appreciate the effort. (mind you, what if I won't be able to come back with anything worth.. we'll see. ) Time to pull the lever to the bat-cave. Later, Barnsley

Hi all, If you are European and or living there, you might want to catch up on the latest updates regarding European Parliament OKs talks for Dublin reform Please correct me if I'm wrong, but 1. Isn't this how 'people's homes are actually sold from above their heads'? 2. From next year it might be a little difficult to live (civil wars tend to make the streets rather noisy and hard to have a relaxing stroll with friends from flying bricks and flaming cocktails' accidentally' being tossed) in most of European countries. +1 Fun fact - Next year is Polland's 100 year National Independence anniversary Barnsley

Thanks, I had considered various investments back in the day and settled investing into myself until I got smarter... I still don't consider myself smart enough, still investing in the same. Can I infer, the debts of others falls into a different category according to you? The 'can do' category? Would you say that relationships, most prominently friendships are also investments? Barnsley

I had to read it several times and I still can't grasp it fully. Sigh. So the time has come to start 'abandoning the sinking ship'? We don't deserve it anymore it seems. Here's the article about the European Union's escalating push for a Dublin reform Why did we allow our EMPs to vote with 390 yes, 175 no votes and 44 abstentions? I'm awestruck and starting to notice my thoughts regularly wondering towards seeking out a new place where people have integrity and actually 'walk the walk' the opposite direction. How can we be so removed so that now 'there's actual plans being drawn up to sell our houses from above our heads'? Well, I guess the security and public sector gonna boom for a short while at first from all that 'wellcoming and smooth-integration'. I haven't seen many outlets bringing this issue up. 'Is it a duck?' I hope someone corrects me. Barnsley

Indeed. "Good manners are oil..." No rush, life's more important (obviously). I like to establish levels of commitment in arguments... that's why I asked (disclosure) Be back when there's any update. Have a productive day, Barnsley

I also remembered an individual who's work you might enjoy, perhaps even connect with (based on your interests) Here's Styx. All the best man! Barnsley

Hi @lightblind Call that creatively straightening things out, more power to you and thumbs up on your approach to healing. I went and had a look at articles, pieces at I hope, more people do. All the best, Barnsley P.S : mittens or fingered gloves?

Oh, gosh. Annoying delivery (worthless personal assertion of mine) but did make the effort to listen. Take my opinion for what's it worth: 'No. It's damaging to everyone, worse you dig yourself deeper... I wish you to stop trying to 'game' the system and rather start connecting with the virtuous, honest, well-intended...foremost, would you see value in if you mourned rather than circumventing with role-playing? 1. You're wrong by thinking, evil can be countered with evil, except if you wish to become evil yourself. a. Can you become more confident deep down by practising body language and pretending un-lived convictions? 2. I hold little respect towards people who recommend lying in any shape or form. Sorry but in real life I would see you as a red flag, someone who openly aims to extract benefits for herself to the expense of others. Your message tells me... not a good person... yet. 3. Have you thought about revisiting your underlying motivations? Therapy perhaps? Barnsley

Hi @Rajon A quote from this article : [...] " Altai in southern Siberia sits right at the centre of Russia. But the tiny, mountainous republic has a claim to fame unknown until now - Native Americans can trace their origins to the remote region. DNA research revealed that genetic markers linking people living in the Russian republic of Altai, southern Siberia, with indigenous populations in North America. A study of the mutations indicated a lineage shift between 13,000 and 14,000 years ago - when people are thought to have walked across the ice from Russia to America." [...] ... aaand if there were mass-graves indicating that the 'immigrants' were quite good at 'forceful negotiations' with the then aboriginal locals, wouldn't it be a logical conclusion to infer that the mainstream perspective on the Indians, colonisation is at the least... suffers the blatant lies of willful omissions? - some would ask. I thought I shared these thoughts, given you seemed interested in the topic. I am not particularly. Barnsley