_LiveFree_

I didn't say working a mind-numbing job was permanent. It's a means to an end. You have to make sacrifices in life. No way around that. Holding a job that is less than agreeable while you look for better work is not a big deal. Stef left the software industry to start a philosophy podcast only AFTER making big bucks for years and then having a second full income with his wife's work. In other words, he had backup and a solid foundation. It took many years before this show started pulling in an ok amount of money. This dude is in a crisis. He needs to change what he's been doing. Running from stability and personal responsibility is what got him here. If he was 16 i'd say "yeah, kid. go start a business because you don't want to work at a crap job your whole life." Too late for that at this time. Career/business ownership is longterm. Basic needs being met is right here right now.

Because he said the money has run out. There aren't anymore savings. The job is not important. Having steady reliable income is. Best way to do that quickly is to go work for someone. As a suggestion, if you live in a safe area, consider food delivery (pizza, etc.) You'll get tips on every shift which means cash directly into your pocket. As well as a paycheck plus semi-flexible hours. You can do that part-time even while you look for better work. It's easier to get a decent job if you are already employed. Pizza delivery is just easy to get no matter what. You need to start multi-tasking. For instance, do you exercise regularly? While you exercise, listen to podcasts or audiobooks about a skill you want to learn. Look for tasks you can combine so as to do them concurrently. Commit 100% to putting yourself back on track. Make a list of big ideas you want to accomplish. Then make a couple of medium sized lists on how to accomplish the big list. Then make smaller lists for manageable steps you can take each month/week/day. Break this all down into the smallest bits you can handle and then work the shit out of those small bits. Example... Big idea list (1 item) Not be depressed anymore Medium list Get a job Pay for therapy update wardrobe small list (get a job) write up a one page resume get feedback and editing assistance on resume physically take a packet full of printed resumes to business close by talk with manager about job repeat until job is acquired small list (pay for therapy) once job is secure, write up budget allocate funds for therapy look online for a therapist call around and interview therapists make an appointment with a good interviewee go to appointment small list (update wardrobe) once job is secure, write up a list of basic clothing needed (2 weeks worth of undies, socks, etc / jeans / slacks / work clothes / casual color shirts / 3 pairs of shoes) in budget, allocate reasonable amount per paycheck for each article of clothing execute budget plan in 3 months have the basics covered These are examples, but if you struggle to get moving, this is what you need to do. Keep your lists on you and look at them multiple time a day. They need to be at the forefront of your mind. Overpower your procrastination with sheer force of will. Get rid of words like "Should" and "Could", and replace them with a wordless desire to move and COMPLETE TASKS.

Ok, for the people saying don't get a job. Here's the problem. He's 39 years old and broke. The time for experimenting to "find yourself" is long past. You have to get on this stuff immediately. The buy and sell books thing is small minded, meaning it doesn't go anywhere. If you start this kind of behavior, you'll be alone at 60 still selling junk for pennies. You have a lot going on here that needs work. In order to do that work, you need a stable foundation. If you're going to have trauma to process in your past, do it sooner rather than later. You say you're "perfectly healthy and in good shape". Well, you're about to turn 40. That changes pretty quickly. You don't need philosophical discussions and experimentation. You need action and you need it now. Get a job with steady income. Then from there you'll tackle step 2. You're 40. Stop dicking around.

This is a really good talk. Just wanted to point out something I noticed. You said he called you a "taker" or something like that. Like an emotional vampire? Correct me if I'm mistaken. Interesting, though, how he isolated himself from others except for you. Do you think it's right that he should demand all of his socialization from you? Did you get anything out of him being that dependent on you?

#1 get a job. You have to eat. You have to have a place to live. Food service is easy to get into. Once you've done that, then worry about what's next. 1 step at a time buddy

Some good posts. Now let's cut to it. You don't trust her. Realize it.

The author has some persona issues she needs to work out. Instead, she's writing articles on the internet trying to garner support in order to sedate her unease. Mental dysfunction.

For a tree to grow its seed must be planted in fertile soil. Won't grow in sand.

Can you tell us a bit about your mother and your relationship with her?

I don't know if it will help, but someone uploaded it to YouTube.

What a wonderful thread!! Thank you to all who've posted! Great work!! Kimmen, have you or your wife read/listened to Stefan's book Real-Time Relationships: The Logic of Love? The central point of the book is how to interact with those closest to you when emotions try to trip you up. May help with your son.

Hey Kiwi Lady! Best of luck to you! Why not add a very flattering photo of yourself to your profile? There are good single men here but they can be more reserved than most. I'd recommend donating up to the philosopher king level so that you have access to subforums only accessible to gold and up. Since you are 35 I'd highly recommend you do not holdback. Make YouTube videos. Join casual athletic groups. Put yourself out there like a supernova! Everything you can think of. Seems like you're on it, though. I actually met my significant other right here on these very forums, so it's possible! Have you met with a therapist about your pattern in romantic relationships? My former therapist helped me process what was pushing me to be a rescuer. Eek! The worst. Internal Family Systems Therapy is great. Have you noticed that all of your past romantic partners have one or a few similar traits, almost as if they could be somewhat interchangeable at times?

And this is a good reason to make sure atheism is not forgotten in this fight. Communism is more widespread than it has ever been. There is a golden opportunity here to spread the message of personal liberty to those of Arab decent; because you have to know communists are going after them in a major way.

Dealing with anger is like dealing with a flood. If you start working on defending against aggressively rising water as it happens you'll drown. You have to make preparations and have a plan for when it floods beforehand. Or you can use the analogy of a hurricane. People board up their homes and business days before the storm hits. It's impossible and incredibly dangerous to do it while the storm is there. The anger is there to protect the wounded child. You know this. Want to deal with the anger? Speak to the wounded child, and speak to him often. Not sometimes when it's "self-knowledge time". But all the time. "You" go about your life understanding grown up things. The child does not. I rescued a feral cat once. She had lived in the wild for the first 8 months of her life. When i found her she had wounds on her and would not let me touch her at all. It took 2 months of sitting outside with her, throwing food bits at her, talking to her about anything for her to start to creep closer to me. Now I did have to trick her to catch her, but that's because she's a cat. No tricking the wounded child. Anyway, for the next four weeks when I wasn't at work I sat with her on the floor, playing with her, talking to her. Eventually, she began to trust me and would sleep on my bed. She would let me pet her and scratch her ears. And then she would want to sleep on my chest. It was a very slow progression and took an enormous amount of patience. See, these are things you should have received growing up in order to form an indestructible bond with your parents. As a baby you keep them up all night crying, you poop and pee all over them, you're always hungry. You completely change their lives and demand most of their time. They are supposed to love you anyway. And when you grow up, you do more stupid stuff, which they are supposed to take in stride and use to teach you better. Always dealing in good faith, trust, and gentleness. They maliciously and repeatedly violated that bond. Now it's up to you to do what they should have done. Face it bro, you're a parent to an abused child. You have a #1 priority right now. Regardless of what you choose, you will always have this part with you. So however you treat it --with fear, impatience, rage, or with love, tenderness, patience and understanding-- it will grow in that direction. Talk to that part, ask it questions. Be gentle and patient. Everything you're looking for will come out of this relationship.

My original response disappeared. Oh well.. You're afraid of something. What is it?

Bullshit.

In order to get past the awkwardness, admit to yourself you want to fuck the living daylights right out of her brains. Say it out loud. Then realize there is nothing wrong with that desire. Now the important part. Unless you just want to hit it then quit it, put it out of your mind. In your original post you talked about you A LOT. The only thing you had to say about her was how hot she is. In other words, you don't know dick about her. Flirting/cheap attention is not forming a sustainable relationship. You were both peacocking each other in the gym but you were too chicken to close. For a decent woman, you can recover by acknowledging your timidity and then stop being timid and ask her out. Women don't want a man who's afraid of them or afraid of himself. Head up, chest out, soft touch, and look her in the eyes. You CANNOT approach a woman you want to screw by pretending you just want to be friends. Make it clear you are sexually attracted to her and then learn about her by asking her questions. BE HONEST. Women are not goddesses to be worshipped. Don't put the pussy on a pedestal. To do so is to try and make her a slave to your fantasies. Be honest. Tell her what you want. Ask honest questions. Give honest answers. If she's worth being around, then FIND OUT through honest conversation. Fucktacular asses sag with age, every last one of them. A good woman, whether lover or friend (and don't worry she'll let you know if you're paying attention) will be there even when you look like otter anus. I look terrible, worst I've looked in my whole life, right now. Haven't been adjusting my diet and exercise for getting older. Also other reasons. My girlfriend can't help but jump my bones every night. Why? Confident honesty and mental strength. She has a deep attraction to me that has far less to do with my cascading ripples of donuts turned flesh. Honesty is the ultimate pussy slayer. Get out there and don't be a goddamn wuss.

I think what we will see is the rise of a new culture that is not centered around a religion, nor in direct opposition to it. Humanity is about 35 weeks pregnant with a baby called Freedom. Birth is a dangerous bloody thing.

noun 1. Physics. the amount of a given fissionable material necessary to sustain a chain reaction at a constant rate. 2. an amount necessary or sufficient to have a significant effect or to achieve a result:a critical mass of popular support. Once Critical Mass is achieved, the attack pressure will skyrocket overnight. Expect complete shutdowns of alternative media. Now is the time to strengthen and expand media output resources. The tipping point will be the first indictment of a major player. Maybe a Huma Abedin type or a Circuit Court Judge. The resistance we are seeing now is the surface tension on the balloon. When you pop a balloon there is a great expulsion of air outwards. When we pop the Deep State Globalist's network, there will be over-reaching attacks on every front. The greatest of which will be a dramatic increase in interests rates as the bankers look to finish off the dollar, collapse the American economy, and shake up the world stage like never before. --"Order out of chaos"-- You will know this is coming when many of the big players can no longer be found on our shores. The violent expulsion of force is directed at us, while the material forming the balloon implodes, eating itself. When they begin attacking each other is when we've finally won. Look to the EU for clairvoyance.

I'd love to see him have an argument with himself. Head on left side of screen is regular Stefan, head on right is a character. This could be used for humor, educational, or even very dramatic. Think a conversation between parent and child. We know he's got the chops to pull it off, and they have the capability to edit something like that. Could be a very powerful format.

My goodness, where does the time go? Forgot about this one. Well then,... I think the collarless shit + jacket would be a good way to go. It's versatile in that it can easily switch between casual and semi-formal. now cough The Northern Hemisphere called, it wants its hair back. And what's really cool is when you throw a jacket on top... Don't button the top button unless you have a jacket, otherwise we'll have to call you "Comrade" (esp. if you're wearing a collarless jacket! eek!). https://theidleman.com/manual/advice/how-wear-grandad-collar-shirt/ ...and with some Stef-style colors... I'll try not to forget this thread again. Not having a Cheeto run for president may help. And as always, all my hopes for Stef coming out wearing a brown leather jacket. Long live Star-Lord/Han Solo/Indian Jones P.S. I've changed my mind about the beard. Beard is good, beard is wise. . .beard love you long time.

Well, at least this wasn't a case of "leaked" video where public outcry caused authorities to investigate. She was observed in real-time assaulting the child and was immediately confronted by her co-workers who called the police. Progress.

Ok, thanks I missed that.

I stand by what I said.

Not sure why you got a down vote for that so I fixed it. I agree. I don't think the war on drugs was in his platform during the campaign (or if it was, it was a very small part of it). So it is definitely a surprise. We know one thing for certain. Trump is not a moron and is very aware of the effects of the War on Drugs. I was thinking about this last night. If I were Trump, and I was genuine in my desire and drive to "drain the swamp" and actually try to fix America, I'd go after the entrenched "deep state"/pedo rings/globalists who are a direct threat to America and my life. How do they stay funded? Likely through the drug trade. Now a purely Libertarian response to that is, "Well legalize it all and de-fund them through competition!" The problem with that is it would take years and --and this is the really important part-- you would lose all of your leads and connections. Right now you can take the full force of the United States government and throw it against their funding sources while acquiring lots of evidence against them. If you legalize, that all evaporates. If you legalize, all you do is mildly hurt them temporarily as they retool their distribution models to hide right out in the open. Do I think the drug war ruins lives? Absolutely. Do I wish there was a better way? Yes. However, I am unable to argue against this position right now. What do you think? Edit: The drug war was created to hide the deep state as it funds itself to conduct illegal activities. Now Trump is going to turn this on its head and actually go after the distributors. Seems like a mistake, but it's a massive shot across the bow of the Globalists.